Monday, May 22, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 22, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): While Donald Trump now asserts that the trafficking of underage girls is a bad thing, he did not always hold that viewpoint. Investigators have uncovered receipts that indicate that Ivanka is not Donald's biological daughter after all, that Donald actually purchased her from Russian friends when she was the tender age of four. "I got a great deal on her," Donald was recently heard bragging to Steve Bannon. "And I'm not giving her back." Some reporters have speculated that Donald's fear of losing his daughter/girlfriend is the real reason he continually tries to convince the press to stop reporting on the Russia connection. DNA tests that could resolve the question of Ivanka's parentage have yet to be administered or even agreed to.

Sunday, May 21, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 21, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Accomplices of Donald Trump revealed today that Donald has recently become very religious, even going so far as to strike a deal with God, which explains the itinerary for Donald's first trip abroad as president. In exchange for God removing all evidence of Trump's criminal and treasonous activity, Donald promises to not get any more divorces, and will stay with his current wife Ivanka until her death.

Saturday, May 20, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 20, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Reporters have discovered Donald Trump's weakness: he only exists when cameras are recording him. He feeds off the attention. Turn the cameras off, and Donald Trump disappears. Leave the cameras off long enough, and he will wither away and die. The reporters are busy spreading this message, knowing the last holdout will be Donald's accomplice, FOX News.

Friday, May 19, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 19, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Soon you won't be reading anything negative about Donald Trump, for he has signed a bill which will make it illegal to say or print anything unflattering about him. "I'm going to put the fake news in jail," Donald said to a small crowd of adoring illiterates. "They have a choice: either print stories about how great I am or go to prison."

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Trump Supporters Are Horrible People

We already know that Trump supporters are not the brightest folks around. But it is alarming to me just how awful these people are.

An individual named Gina Vaughan commented on a post that I had left on Donald Trump's Facebook page. This is what Gina had to say: "Michael Doherty You're not even American dipwad... shut youir coxhoslter and worry about the muzziees that have overrun London"

I responded: "Gina Vaughan, I think you took a double dose there. Your drug intake should be supervised." And then I went to Gina's page, and she has her personal settings such that anyone apparently can comment on her posts. And so I did. She had shared a photo poking fun at the truth of James Comey's statement.


I commented: "Gina, you're a dipshit. Good luck to you on all your endeavors, such as tying your shoes, parking your car, memorizing the alphabet." And that set off a string of comments from Gina and a couple of her friends. Here is that exchange (note particularly that comment from Jeffrey N. Ponzio): 



Note that while Gina brags about being incredibly intelligent, she erroneously uses the word "lay" in place of "lie." But her buddy Jeffrey is even worse, even typing "Fucking faggot." Nice. By the way, Jeffrey's settings are such that anyone can leave a comment on his posts as well (so if you are so inclined, you can tell that bastard exactly what you think of him).

Here are a couple of the posts on Jeffrey's Facebook page:


And here is a photo that Gina Vaughan posted on her page:


Frightening. Here is one more post from Gina's page:


So this is the type of person that supports Donald Trump. This is the type of person we are dealing with here. Both Gina and Jeffrey are racists with violent tendencies.

Photo From Work: May 17, 2017

What the hell is a scien?

Alternative Fact: May 18, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump has officially eliminated the process for impeachment in the United States. "No more impeachment for anyone ever," Donald told the stunned press corps. "Unless I can still impeach Obama or Hillary." He then asked, "Can I?"

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 17, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump has outlawed all history courses in high schools and colleges throughout the country. Explaining the move, Donald told reporters, "It doesn't matter what I said yesterday, it only matters what I'm saying right now."

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 16, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump reminded the nation, "No one is above the law." He then added, "Except me, my family, and some of my friends in Russia, obviously."

Monday, May 15, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 15, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump has agreed to let Felix H. Sater rent Melania for a week for the relatively small sum of $10,000. "Felix is a great friend, and that's why I gave him such a deal," Donald said. "Usually Melania commands a much greater sum for her services."

Sunday, May 14, 2017

Trump Supporters Are Idiots, Round Eight

Friends, do you remember Brenda Collins of San Angelo, Texas? She was the subject of Trump Supporters Are Idiots, Round Seven. Well, today she allowed her stunning intellect to shine once again. I had posted today's alternative fact on Melania Trump's Facebook page. Here it is:

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Hoping to coax Melania back into bed with him (on those nights when Ivanka is otherwise occupied), Donald Trump has given her the state of Hawaii to do with as she will. Melania is reportedly thrilled with her gift, noting that it is located some distance from Washington, D.C. When Donald's consultants pointed this out to him, he told them to see about exchanging the gift for Virginia or possibly Maryland.

Brenda Collins responded: "Michael Doherty You are a lying sack of manure."

You'd think after our previous exchange, she would have known where I was coming from. But that of course is overestimating the intelligence of Brenda Collins and her ilk. She actually believes that I think Donald Trump gave Melania the state of Hawaii, that it is in Donald's power to do so. Wow. Here is my response to her: "Brenda Collins, you might be my favorite of all the idiots. You still don't have a grasp on the idea of what an 'alternative fact' is, do you, honey? Life must be difficult for you."

This makes me wonder how these people are able to function. Life really must be difficult for them. Unless, of course, they are so hopelessly stupid that they don't even realize how difficult a time they're having. In which case, perhaps they are the happiest people on the planet. I don't know. Any thoughts on the matter, Brenda Collins? 

Alternative Fact: May 14, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Hoping to coax Melania back into bed with him (on those nights when Ivanka is otherwise occupied), Donald Trump has given her the state of Hawaii to do with as she will. Melania is reportedly thrilled with her gift, noting that it is located some distance from Washington, D.C. When Donald's consultants pointed this out to him, he told them to see about exchanging the gift for Virginia or possibly Maryland.

Saturday, May 13, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 13, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): A White House intern was fired last night after refusing to give Jeff Sessions and Donald Trump a bubble bath in Donald's giant's tub. "It wasn't even the bath that I objected to," she told reporters this morning. "After all, they both needed a good scrubbing. What I just couldn't bring myself to do was follow Donald's request to wear an Ivanka wig and some of her perfume."

More Messages To Fascist Pig Donald Trump

When his supporters chant "USA! USA! USA!" I bet Donald Trump is disappointed that they are not chanting "Donald! Donald! Donald!" Perhaps that's what he hears in his head, because he is trying to replace the democratic system with the Donald system. He likely believes that he is, in fact, the USA. Well, the whole damn thing is frightening beyond all measure. So I like to send him little messages now and again, just as a way of reminding him and his mindless followers that not everyone is on board the Donald Express, no matter how bright and shiny the train might be. Here are a few messages I've sent the bastard in the last couple of months.
  • Donald, you just can't get enough adoration, can you? Was there ever a more extreme narcissist than you?  (on Facebook, 3-16-17, in response to this post by the so-called president: "Thank you Nashville, Tennessee! Together, we will Make America Great Again!" - with a video of his rally) 
  • Who loves Donald more than Donald? No one. No one even comes close to loving Donald as much as Donald does. Donald is Donald's biggest, greatest fan. Donald holds Donald rallies. Donald answers questions about a variety of topics, but the answers are always about Donald, not about the subject asked. Because, really, what subject holds as much fascination for Donald as Donald? The Donald movement continues, brought to us all by Donald. (on Facebook, 3-16-17, in response to this post by Donald: "Our MOVEMENT continues – God bless you and God bless the USA!" - with a photo of his recent rally) 
  • So, asshole, are you going to apologize to Obama for accusing him of a crime he didn't commit? Are you going to apologize to the country? Are you going to act like a leader, someone people could possibly respect? Are you going to take responsibility for your mistakes? Or are you going to continue to lie to everyone and to maintain your lies? I'm guessing you'll continue to lie. Please prove me wrong, asshole.  (on Facebook, 3-20-17)
  • Donald, did you have fun at your routine public masturbation event? I hope so, because I'm guessing you won't have time for too many more. (on Facebook, 3-20-17, in response to this post by the so-called president: "Incredible crowd tonight – thank you Louisville, Kentucky! Together, we will Make America SAFE and GREAT again!")
  • Ha! Ha! Ha! Work night and day? Fucking hilarious, Donald. What's sad is that your followers are so blind and so bloody stupid that they believe you, despite all the evidence to the contrary. After all, what need do the very stupid have for facts? They have a leader who tells them they don't have to pay attention to facts, and they love him for it. (on Facebook, in response to a photo with a caption that reads, "As President, I will work night and day to make America safe again.")
  • "Exciting" isn't necessarily positive. I'm sure World War II was an exciting time. I'm sure being on the Titanic as it sank was exciting.  (on Facebook, 3-31-17, in response to this post by the so-called president: "It is an exciting time for our country!") 
  • Excellent! Donald, I assume you'll be standing by the victims of your fake university scheme, and by the woman who alleged you raped her when she was thirteen - you know, the woman who then received death threats until she dropped the lawsuit.  (on Facebook, 4-3-17, in response to this post by the so-called president: "This week, we stand with crime victims and their families, and we renew our commitment to safeguarding America's communities from crime.")
  • So, are you going to allow Syrian refugees into the country? Or are you going to continue to be a total fucking asshole?  (on Twitter, 4-6-17) 
  • Donald, you are so full of shit. Have you ever spoken the truth? To anyone? About anything? Seriously, I want to know. It seems that every time you speak, birds should land on your head and start pecking at you.  (on Facebook, 4-7-17, in response to this post by the so-called president: "A future of peace, safety, and prosperity — that is our guiding light, and always will be.") 
  • Donald, you delusional narcissist, why must you continue to lie about everything? And, more importantly, why are you so determined to destroy the world? What the fuck is wrong with you? Is anyone monitoring your medication? (on Facebook, 4-13-17)
 This is a photo I took of Donald Trump's Twitter page on April 16, 2017:



And this is the comment I left, along with that photo, on his page: "Asshole, try to keep from contradicting yourself in two consecutive 'tweets.' Is this election over, or are you continuing to brag?"

More messages to Donald:
  • There is no one in the history of the world who understands Truth less than Donald Trump. Truth and Donald have never once been in the same room. Donald even lies in his dreams. Even his snores are lies. If he sneezed, the response would be "I don't believe you" rather than "bless you." (on Facebook, in response to this bullshit from the mendacious scoundrel: "The Fake Media (not Real Media) has gotten even worse since the election. Every story is badly slanted. We have to hold them to the truth!")
  • Donald Trump died yesterday, but the Republicans are refusing to bury his hideous, bloated corpse. What gives? Read about his incredible death in Alternative Facts: (and I included a link to my Alternative Facts) (on Facebook, 4-19-17)
  • Wrong. Wrong, Wrong. You don't give you a fuck. Stop lying. The only thing you celebrate is Donald Trump, you delusional prick. (on Twitter, 4-22-17, in response to this bullshit from Donald: "Today on Earth Day, we celebrate our beautiful forests, lakes and land. We stand committed to preserving the natural beauty of our nation.")
  • If you want Donald to get rid of something, just call it a "regulation" or say that Obama put it in place. He won't look any further into it than that, but will say it's bad and that he's getting rid of it.  (on Facebook, 4-25-17, in response to this post by the so-called president: "Congratulations to our new Secretary of Agriculture, Sonny Perdue! We’re getting to work immediately to eliminate unnecessary regulations and to promote agriculture and rural prosperity across America.")
  • Since day one, Donald's team of incompetent, unqualified racists have been busy dismantling democracy, turning its citizens against one another, and finding new ways to make themselves even richer. In the process, they inadvertently revealed that a significant portion of the country's population is hopelessly stupid. They gather those stupid people together in regularly held Trump rallies to make them feel better about themselves. (on Facebook, 5-5-17)
  • France was able to avoid the mistake the U.S. made. No fascist fuck for the French. (on Twitter, 5-7-17, in response to this post by the so-called president: "Congratulations to Emmanuel Macron on his big win today as the next President of France. I look very much forward to working with him!") 
  • Fuck you, Donald. Everyone knows why you fired him. So just cut the shit. (on Twitter, 5-10-17, in response to this post by that fucking liar: "Dems have been complaining for months & months about Dir. Comey. Now that he has been fired they PRETEND to be aggrieved. Phony hypocrites!"
  • Very active? Are you fucking kidding me? Donald, I will give you five dollars if you will eat a turd that I produce for you. (on Twitter, 5-12-17, in response to this nonsense from dipshit Donald: "As a very active President with lots of things happening, it is not possible for my surrogates to stand at podium with perfect accuracy!....")
 

Friday, May 12, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 12, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Sean Spicer has ordered several large bushes and a hedge to be placed around the podium in the press briefing room so that he will feel more comfortable when fielding questions from reporters. "I just like to be among bushes," he said to the amused press corps.

Thursday, May 11, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 11, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): All government employees are now required to sign an oath of loyalty to Donald Trump, promising to always love him, to tell him he's great every time they see him, and to refrain from investigating him and his activities. Republicans, having sold their souls months ago, were delighted and eager to sign to prove their patriotism and continuing usefulness to the despot.

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 10, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): When Donald Trump was told by Ivanka that his many cries of "Fake news" were not enough to put an end to the F.B.I.'s investigation into his criminal activity, he went into a panic. But Ivanka then suggested he simply fire F.B.I. director James Comey. "I can do that?" Donald asked, wiping the tears from his face. "You can do anything," Ivanka assured him. "You are the president." Thrilled that he could once again use his old catch phrase from his television program The Apprentice, Donald immediately called Comey and told him, "You're fired." He then got online and boasted: "As President, I cannot be charged with any crimes. And anyone who tries looking into my many criminal enterprises will be fired and will not be back next season." Donald then went to a commercial break.

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 9, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump claimed today that Mike Flynn himself is fake news. "There is no Mike Flynn," Donald said during an unscheduled press conference. "That was Obama in disguise. He was here to spy on me, place wiretaps on my phones and in my special pillow fight room that I share with Ivanka. That's why I fired him. I fired Obama." When the stunned press attempted to ask him questions, Donald reminded everyone that he won the election and that fifty billion people had attended his inauguration. He then asked for his mother, before being quietly led from the podium by the White House Easter Bunny.

Monday, May 8, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 8, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): The ghost of swashbuckler Andrew Jackson was seen by several staff members this weekend stalking the corridors of the White House and repeatedly bragging that he would have stopped the Civil War if only he'd still been alive.

Trump Supporters Are Idiots, Round Seven

Trump supporters are not bright. We are all well aware of this. And Trump supporters in Texas are particularly daft. I had posted today's alternative fact on the Republican Party's Facebook page. And I prefaced it by saying, "Today's alternative fact," letting folks know that it's a fun bit of nonsense.

Actually, here is precisely what I posted on that page:

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump tried to hire George Lucas to release a Special Edition of the inauguration celebration in which thousands of spectators would be digitally added to certain scenes. Lucas was initially interested in the project until Trump nixed his idea of adding stormtroopers, imperial officers and a family of Hutts to the background.

So Brenda Collins, a Republican living in San Angelo, Texas, responded. And this is what she said: "You are full of crap." I laughed so fucking hard, then replied: "Brenda Collins, you Texans are really on the ball." Because what Brenda Collins was saying was that the fake thing I had posted, the thing I prefaced by announcing it was fake, was fake. Brenda Collins is typical of the kind of person who supports Donald Trump. And there is just nothing we can do with her, or with any of them, but shake our heads and wonder how they're able to feed themselves.

Good luck to you, Brenda Collins of San Angelo, Texas.

Sunday, May 7, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 7, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump tried to hire George Lucas to release a Special Edition of the inauguration celebration in which thousands of spectators would be digitally added to certain scenes. Lucas was initially interested in the project until Trump nixed his idea of adding stormtroopers, imperial officers and a family of Hutts to the background.

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 6, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): After Donald Trump admitted he had difficulty staying awake through the two or three daily meetings he was asked to attend as president, his staff promised not to bother him with any more details of foreign or domestic events and let him sleep. Donald said, "Great, great."

Friday, May 5, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 5, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): School children all over the country were thrilled to learn they would no longer have to memorize any facts whatsoever. Following the president's example, students can now answer any test question with: "I have my own opinions. You can have your own opinions." With Betsy DeVos in charge of the nation's education, teachers will have no choice but to mark those answers as correct. Children celebrated this change by chanting "USA! USA! USA!" and then dropping their text books in front of their schools.

Fun With Trump Supporters: The Game Intelligent People Can Play With Idiots

I'm shocked that Donald Trump is still occupying the White House, and I'm even more shocked that certain individuals still support him, even seem to love him. These people are what we refer to as morons and assholes. They are awful people, without redeeming characteristics, but that doesn't mean you can't play with them. Ridiculing them won't get them to change their minds about anything, but it can be fun. I haven't been playing as much as I used to, because sometimes I just get too angry and it ceases to be fun. But here is some fun I've had in the last few weeks...

Gloria Hughes (on Facebook, 4-18-17): " Freedom isn't free and never has been. Without war, we would be speaking German. I voted for President Trump, because I have no intention of speaking Arab, Korean or Russian. For those, who come from families that are too cowardly to protect that freedom we have all enjoyed, you are free to leave and go to a Country you feel has more freedom. Otherwise, keep enjoying your freedom off the backs of those, who have brave and sacrificial families, willing to die for your freedom"
My response: "Gloria Hughes, be honest: You couldn't learn Arabic, Korean or Russian."

Donald Sailers (on Facebook, 4-19-17): "can any of you people tell me what has trump ever did to you for you to disrespect him as the president of the USA when he won the office for the American people voted for by the American people,"
My response: " Donald Sailers, can you tell me where you went to school and attempted to learn English?"

Saven Mi (on Facebook, 4-20-17): "Who all is thankful to President Trump for being a man of his word, and doing exactly what he said he was gonna do?"
My response: " A man of his word? Which word, exactly? Because any statement he's made, you can find footage of him saying exactly the opposite. He's a democrat, he's a republican. He's pro-choice, he's against abortion. He thinks Hillary would make a great president, he thinks she's crooked. He loves Meryl Streep, he think she's overrated. By the way, you might recall he promised to release his tax returns. A man of his word?" 
(By the way, this woman who calls herself Saven Mi is a prostitute. The Republican Party sure has changed.) 

Stan Piznarski (on Facebook, 4-22-17): "There is no doubt President Trump will be in the White House for the next eight years"
My response: "Stan, good news! Donald Trump is already dead. We're just waiting for the Republicans to remove his hideous, bloated corpse from the White House. They want to keep it in there for eight years, just as you fear, but the smell is already causing some on the staff to become sick. If you missed the story, as reported in Alternative Facts, here is the link. Enjoy!"

Teresa Mader (on Facebook, 4-22-17):  "Thank you Trump we love you and Melania. Looks like many Americans would rather suck on baby bottles and whine all day instead of work for a living. They just dont get it that American tax payers can no longer afford the milk for their bottles."
My response: "Teresa, who is Melania? No one knows this person. Ivanka is the accepted First Lady at this point. And unless you want to raise the ire of the President, I would forget that other woman's name." 

Rob Brando (on Facebook, 4-25-17): "Build the wall!!!! Don't let the Dems stand in your way!!!!"
My response: "Rob Brando, look at all those exclamation points. You must really want that wall. The only punctuation marks that Trump supporters use are exclamation points. That's because Trump supporters are moronic children who believe that shouting is the only way they'll be heard. Isn't that right, Rob Brando, you little baby?" 

Siretha Brown (on Facebook, 4-25-17): "The polls will say anything to not give the President the praise he deserved. You are winning Mr.President know matter what the polls are consistent of."
My response: "'Know matter,' Siretha Brown? 'Know matter'? Geez, you know what the matter is with you fucking Trump supporters? You're all complete morons."

Maria Elias Lopez (on Facebook, 4-29-17): "Why does he still hold rallies, you ask? Because this is how he keeps in touch with America, without the media twisting his words."
My response: "Actually, Maria Elias Lopez, he continues holding these rallies because he is absolutely desperate for affection. He has a constant need for adoration, a constant need to hear that he's loved, that he's doing a good job. He is delusional and insecure beyond measure. He is one sick fuck. That's why he holds these rallies. That's what you're supporting. Enjoy!" 

Erin Schultz (on Facebook, 4-29-17): "You are amazing!! Thank you. We the people believe in you. Your family is smart and gorgeous. Haters are gonna hate. Class wins every time."
My response: "Erin, you're right! Class wins every time. And no one is more classy than Donald Trump. Like when he bragged about hitting on a married woman and talked about her tits. And then he bragged that because he was a celebrity he could do whatever he wanted to women, even grab them by the pussy. So classy, that Donald. It's also really classy to say you're going to do something, then not do it. Some call that lying. But, Erin, you call that class! Good for you, Erin." 

Jeffrey Wooten (on Facebook, 4-29-17): "I will never forget the day after the election!! Almost every police officer had a big smile, beamed with pride, and felt relieved that 8 years of being disrespected by Obama were over."
My response: "Wow, you went around to look at every single police officer in the country? You are a busy little boy, aren't you, Jeffrey? Yes, you are. Yes, you are." 

Cheryl Mayers (on Facebook, 4-30-17): "Loved every minute of this, President Trump NEEDS to do this otherwise the lame stream media will just twist his words around. He explained his position with China being a currency manupulator and it makes perfect sense - we need China to help keep North Korea in check."
My response: "Cheryl, I'm glad you enjoyed Donald's latest exercise in public masturbation. He'll be releasing a DVD soon in which he just repeats 'I am great' for 90 minutes. I have a feeling you'll be adding to that to your collection." 
My second response: "Oh, Cheryl, when you have finished folding your Nazi flag, you might want to go purchase a dictionary. You seem to be having a bit of trouble with your spelling, darling." 

Dick McElhaney (on Facebook, 4-30-17): "Trump was at his best last night. It's about time the country has been blessed with a president who has gone to work 24/7 to put America and its people first."
My response: "Dick - you don't mind if I call you Dick, right? Anyway, Dick, when you say he's gone to work '24/7,' what exactly do you mean? Clearly you don't mean he works 24 hours a day seven days a week. I mean, he doesn't even work 24 hours a week. So what do you mean precisely, Dick? You're still okay with me calling you Dick, right? Oh, maybe you were being sarcastic. Were you being sarcastic, Dick?" 

Brian Shy (on Facebook, 5-3-17): "I hope all sanctionary cites loose all federal funding if they don't comply . Let them stand their ground and find out the hard way"
My response: "Trump supporters continue to struggle with simple spelling and grammar. Professional moron Brian Shy writes, 'I hope all sanctionary cites loose all federal funding.' Of those nine words, three are mistakes. First, Brian, it is 'sanctuary.' Second, you meant to type 'cities,' not 'cites.' And the third error is your use of the word 'loose' when you what you meant is 'lose.' Please return to school before posting any other messages online. Thank you." 
Brian Shy: " Go to school to preach spelling and grammar if you are worried about it . This is not a class . Now back to the best president we ever had is the topic here i"
Brian Shy (responding to a comment I made to another person): "You do have rights and freedoms . You have the right to leave the country and the freedom to choose which one you want to go to"
My response: "Brian Shy, I told you to refrain from posting comments until you've gone back to school."
Then: "And Brian, your last post seems like something you read, not something you thought of yourself. My guess is you are incapable of actual thought. Perhaps it is simply because you are uneducated. I'd prefer to think of you as ignorant rather than an asshole, because I'm in the mood to be nice."
Brian Shy: "Haha Michael the liberal troll . More worried about insults and spelling than topics lol"
Brian Shy: " At least I went . I think your mom home schooled you . Did she pass you after the second grade or give up on you"
My response: "Brian Shy, there you go again. Folks, Brian Shy is typical of the Trump supporter - a complete and utter moron without an original thought, without compassion, without understanding, but with a few phrases and words he can recall from speeches and rallies, phrases and words he clings to as Truth, phrases and words he takes to bed and is comforted by."  
My last response to Brian Shy: "One last thing, Brian. I don't believe you went to school. Or, at least, I don't believe you paid any attention. The proof is in your original post, which I commented on already. But a reminder: 'Sanctionary'? Now, good night, stupid person, and may flights of angels shit on your face as you sleep."   

Thursday, May 4, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 4, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump wants to make one small amendment to the Constitution. He simply wishes to include a small, tasteful advertisement for The Mar-a-Lago Club. "Wherever there is empty space on the paper, space that's not being used for Constitution stuff," Donald explained. "I haven't seen it, but Ivanka told me there is plenty of space in the upper right corner near something about 'the wee people.'"

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 3, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump maintains that calling Senator Elizabeth Warren "Pocahontas" isn't racist, adding that he calls Hillary Clinton "Maleficent," Sean Spicer "Tinker Bell," Steve Bannon "Dumbo," Kellyanne Conway "Sir Hiss" and Ivanka "Jessica Rabbit."

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 2, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump has promised that within the next hundred days he'll stop publicly congratulating himself on what he perceives to be great accomplishments of his first one hundred days playing president.

Monday, May 1, 2017

Alternative Fact: May 1, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Kellyanne Conway denied laying a new clutch of eggs over the weekend, explaining that her breeding time is still nearly a month away and that for now she is entirely focused on helping the president chew his food.

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 30, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Sean Spicer today claimed that the Ivanka that was killed in the embrace with Fake Trump on the White House lawn was actually one of many Ivanka robots that Donald keeps in the White House for sexual gratification, and was not the real Ivanka. "Honestly, I'm not even sure there is a real Ivanka," Spicer added.

Saturday, April 29, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 29, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Sean Spicer stated today that it was Fake Trump that was killed by that carload of angry clowns, and not the real Donald Trump. And since it was also Fake Trump that was involved in the conspiracy with Russia, Spicer said that this should put an end to that story as well.

You'll remember, as reported in Alternative Facts on April 3: Trump revealed on Twitter that there is also a "Fake Trump," and it's this Fake Trump that is supposedly involved with Russia. Donald then defended the Fake Trump, saying, "When will Sleepy Eyes Chuck Todd and @NBCNews start talking about the Obama SURVEILLANCE SCANDAL and stop with the Fake Trump/Russia story?" To help him relax, Trump has promised to take Fake Trump golfing this weekend.

Here is Donald's original message on Twitter about Fake Trump:


Friday, April 28, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 28, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Sean Spicer stated that sealing some Texans on the Mexican side of the wall is simply part of the president's plan to make America great again. For every Texan that is sealed out of the country, America will be that much greater, Spicer explained. For once, it was difficult to argue with his logic.

Thursday, April 27, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 27, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): People in Texas that voted for Donald Trump are enthusiastic about giving up their land for his beloved wall project. And those who will suddenly find themselves on the Mexican side of the wall are especially thrilled with their choice for President.

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 26, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): One of the angry clowns responsible for the deaths of Donald and Ivanka Trump released a statement which reads, in part, "Donald was giving clowns a bad name, and it was determined by clown consensus that he must be stopped." A spokesperson for clowns said today, "Donald was always more buffoon than clown anyway, and the deaths of Donald and his wife could have been prevented had the nation understood that distinction in November."

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

A Note To Democrats

Democrats, you're going about this in entirely the wrong fashion. Donald Trump would be so easy to manipulate. If there is something you don't like, just tell Donald that it's a "regulation" or that Obama is responsible for it, and he'll swear to eliminate it for you. I promise you he won't look any further into it than that. He's not inquisitive or bright, and likely has trouble reading. Just keep your sentences simple. For example, "Obama makes guns." That's how you get rid of guns. Simple as that.

To make him even more receptive to your wishes, preface your remark with this: "You were great on The Apprentice." He'll do whatever you want.

Alternative Fact: April 25, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Though Donald Trump has been dead for a week, his supporters continue to rally around his hideous, bloated corpse, feeling that he now, perhaps even more than before, is one of them, and swearing they will make sure he remains in office for eight years.

Monday, April 24, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 24, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Bill O'Reilly now swears that, like Alex Jones, he was merely playing a role, in his case the role of an insane racist journalist who likes to sexually harass women. O'Reilly insists that was just the part he was playing, and that in reality he is not a journalist at all, nor does he have any interest in women whatsoever.

Sunday, April 23, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 23, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): After Bill O'Reilly's dismissal, bloated corpse Donald Trump is under even more pressure to provide a public voice for desperate fans of insane racist rants and sexual harassment. Sean Spicer, in a statement today, assured the nation that hideous bloated corpse Donald Trump was up to the task.

Saturday, April 22, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 22, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Alien races have finally contacted Earth. It happened late last night after several alien civilizations caught wind of a supposed plan by NASA to send Donald Trump's bloated corpse into space. The message NASA received, signed by multiple alien races, reads, "We don't want that asshole out here."

Friday, April 21, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 21, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Sean Spicer confirmed that even though Alex Jones has now admitted to being a total fake, Donald Trump's bloated corpse still enjoys being propped up in front of the radio to listen his program.

Thursday, April 20, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 20, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Now that Donald Trump has been dead for a couple of days, Melania is, for the first time, seriously considering moving into the White House.

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 19, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Sean Spicer assured the nation that Donald Trump's hideous, bloated corpse is still in control of the country. "While it's true that yesterday Donald and Ivanka were killed by a carload of angry clowns, absolutely nothing has changed," Spicer said at a today's press conference. After a moment, he added, "The president may spend a little less time on Twitter."

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Trump Supporters Are Idiots, Round Six

Wow, the Trump supporters just won't stop proving themselves to be dingbats and shitheads.

I posted a link to my alternative fact on Donald's Facebook page, introducing it like this: Don't worry, folks. Donald Trump is dead. That's right: dead. You can read about it here...

And it contained a link to this alternative fact:

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Today my dream came true. A clown car pulled up onto the White House lawn, and fifteen angry clowns climbed out, a dozen of them carrying a long string of barbed wire, which they began wrapping around Donald and Ivanka, winding it tighter and tighter, the barbs tearing into their twisted flesh. While they did that, one of the other clowns played a lovely dirge on ukulele, while the remaining two clowns performed an elegant interpretive dance, not easy to do in those giant shoes. When the song and dance were finished, the other clowns unwound the barbed wire, and all of them got back into the car, leaving the hideous corpses of Donald and Ivanka in an eternal embrace on the lawn. A witness reports seeing a strangely satisfied smile on Donald's deceased face as the clown car drove off into the Washington, D.C. morning traffic.

A fascist calling himself Pal Max commented on my post...

Pal Max: Your post is most certainly a death threat against the POTUS. I am on the phone now reporting you.
My response: Pal Max, good for you, you little Nazi. You are the perfect citizen for the new fascist America. No sense of humor.
Joseph Soto: Pal Max So am I...
My response: Joseph Soto, while you're on hold, you might enjoy reading some of my other alternative facts, you moron: 
(And I included a link to my alternative facts.)

Unfortunately, it turns out Pal Max isn't even a real person. His Facebook page is completely empty. No friends, no posts, nothing. Joseph Soto, however, has lots of crazy shit on his page. Lots of anti-Obama and anti-Clinton stuff, as well as weird biblical quotes, posts from a group calling itself Conservative Patriots, and stuff like "Texans for Jesus." Yeah, you get the picture. He even has some nonsense against the Environmental Protection Agency. Joseph Soto is a real piece of work, that one. And, of course, he never followed up. That is, he never posted what response, if any, he got from... well, from whatever number he supposedly called. I hope he did call someone, and I hope whoever received his call enjoyed reading my alternative facts. By the way, a member of Joseph's family, Margie Soto, studied at a place called Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry, which made me laugh out loud. I don't know if that's a real place or not, and I kind of don't want to know. I just want to remain amused.

Alternative Fact: April 18, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Today my dream came true. A clown car pulled up onto the White House lawn, and fifteen angry clowns climbed out, a dozen of them carrying a long string of barbed wire, which they began wrapping around Donald and Ivanka, winding it tighter and tighter, the barbs tearing into their twisted flesh. While they did that, one of the other clowns played a lovely dirge on ukulele, while the remaining two clowns performed an elegant interpretive dance, not easy to do in those giant shoes. When the song and dance were finished, the other clowns unwound the barbed wire, and all of them got back into the car, leaving the hideous corpses of Donald and Ivanka in an eternal embrace on the lawn. A witness reports seeing a strangely satisfied smile on Donald's deceased face as the clown car drove off into the Washington, D.C. morning traffic.

Monday, April 17, 2017

Fun With Trump Supporters: The Game Continues, April 17th

Those who support Donald Trump are scoundrels, cretins, and assholes. No question about it. But mostly they're just stupid beyond belief. And so the game continues. Here is a little fun I had today on Donald Trump's Facebook page.

Becky Brown  (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "Love you Mr. President. You are doing a phenomenal good job. !!!!!!!!!!!!!"
My response: "Wow, Becky, adding those exclamation points after the period really makes you seem sincere."
(Becky is so bright that she actually liked my response.) 

Laurie Ann Pappas (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "I have stopped watching every news channel except Fox. I have lost all respect for the media and their fake slanted stories. They truly are pathetic! Shame on them all"
My response: "Laurie, Fox doesn't have a news channel. Not really. Are you one of those self-loathing women that actually respects abusive bastards like Donald Trump and Bill O'Reilly? You feel deep down that you deserve to be harassed and hurt, don't you? Well, maybe you do." 

Cristine Gritz (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "I am thankful every day that you are our President! The media is a joke and the intelligent Americans know it! Keep doing what you are doing and know that millions and millions of the silent and LEGAL majority are behind you all the way! You are amazing in everything you do and these snowflakes don't matter! They prefer corruption and deceit!! Heart U President Trump!"
My response: "Cristine Gritz, if you count yourself among those millions of silent people, then please remain silent. Keep your moronic comments to yourself. (And great name, by the way. I'll probably use it in something.)" 

Catherine Robert (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "Dear Mr. President. PLEASE, Never release your taxes! It's too much fun watching the Liberals make fools of themselves about them!"
My response: "Catherine is right! I'd rather watch people get legitimately angry than learn the truth about what foreign powers have financial sway over the leader of our country. Good for you, Catherine, for speaking up for those of us who enjoy the anger of others and don't care about the truth or treason or any of those sorts of things." 

Nancy Jo (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "Those of us with brains realize exactly what the media is doing. They are so obvious!"
My response: "Nancy Jo, you are right! It is so obvious what they're doing - filming what Donald says, taking notes, reporting on his words and deeds. We know what they're up to, what with their note-taking and their recording and their questions and their search for the truth. Those bastards are standing up for democracy. How dare they do that in this great new fascist America that Donald has created. And to be so obvious about it too!" 

Jose Alvarez (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "What's a big deal with the President Taxes. We have many more problems in our country that we should be worry about. Those protesters are not protest because President Trump Tax returns.They are protested because some body are instigating them."
My response: "Jose, your grasp on the English language is commendable. What I think you're saying is that Donald Trump has created a lot more problems, problems that can't be solved by merely looking at his tax returns and discovering what foreign powers have given him money. And that really it is Donald's entire presidency that should be protested."  

Reza Farnood (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "We the people stand by you until the end. I noticed that they try to be smart mouth and disrespect you, but we do not listen. No worries in our end sir"
My response: "Reza, the end will be soon, so then you can sit down and relax. Either way, go on not listening. And when you say you have no worries in your end, are you referring to your anus? Was there some trouble during your checkup?"

Alma Holstein (on Facebook, 4-17-17): "We have your back Mr. President you are right on course we voted you in and we respect you stay true to God and our country and keep moving forward !!!!"
My response: "And avoid using commas and periods at all cost. Commas and periods are the devil's punctuation! The only punctuation marks God-fearing Republicans are allowed to use are exclamation points!"

Alternative Fact: April 17, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): As his attorneys insist, Donald Trump cannot be sued while he is acting as president of the United States, even for things he did before taking office. Since he is above the law, Donald should not feel any constraints when choosing a course of action (or when one is chosen for him by Putin, Bannon, or his poisonous snake Jasper), and so can do whatever he wishes in his noble efforts to make America great again.

Sunday, April 16, 2017

Trump Supporters Are Idiots, Round Five

I've discovered that Trump supporters are either idiots or assholes, so it's best to assume - should you come across one - that he or she is an idiot. It's the kinder way to approach the situation. And certainly it is the case with regards to Dannett Scappaticci (@MrsScappaticci on Twitter).

I had posted a link to today's alternative fact on Donald Trump's page, and Dannett Scappaticci took it upon herself to respond.

Here is what she wrote: Another idiot who gets his info from bloggers lol

An interesting idea, since I am a blogger, and the link she commented on was to my blog. But I'm sure that she didn't recognize how silly her post was.

So I went to her Twitter page to see what other nonsense she'd been posting. And there was certainly a lot of it. She had "re-tweeted" this little gem from a real winner named Mark Dice: Has ISIS infiltrated Berkeley - or are those just Anti-Trump protesters? It's impossible to tell the difference anymore.

My response: Intelligent people can tell the difference. But for Trump supporters, I understand everything is difficult.
(And I included a link to one of my "Fun With Trump Supporters" posts.)

Dannett Scappaticci then felt a need to respond. This was her brilliant response: Intelligence is a word you should never use as it was never used to describe you lmao

My response: "Intelligence" is a noun, moron, so it's not used to describe people.

(By the way, I think very little of people who type "lol" and "lmao." Also, I suspect they're liars. Are they really laughing out loud?)
 
Dannett Scappaticci, being too stupid to understand she should quit, then typed this:  Actually youre just a moron. But hey keep going its quite comical

My response: If you're going to call someone a "moron," make sure you don't have spelling and grammatical errors in your post. Geez, you're an idiot.

Yes, Dannett Scappaticci is the type of person that supports Donald Trump.

Alternative Fact: April 16, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Ivanka Trump was not given a free ride. She had to earn every dollar bill her daddy left on her dresser.

Saturday, April 15, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 15, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump is currently working to get permission from Vladimir Putin to release his tax returns, as he promised he would. Because, as you know, Donald Trump keeps all his campaign promises.

Friday, April 14, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 14, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump confirmed today that his military policy is to bomb anything that makes Ivanka sad.

To Deborah Pollack, A Sad, Frightened Creature

Friends, not many people knew Deborah Pollack. And fewer understood her. That's because she was a raving lunatic who listened to the voices she believed spoke to her through her radio and her microwave oven, long after her electricity had been shut off due to lack of payment. But I got to know her briefly, in that short period before the medication turned her brain to total mush. She communicated with me, and then suddenly disappeared, her words disappearing with her. This post then is in memory of Deborah Pollack, a baffled and befuddled mess of hair and rags and kitty litter.

Though her words are now gone, my messages to her remain. I include them here for the record.

Thursday, April 13 2017, 10:01 p.m.: Uh-oh, we've angered one of them. To calm Deborah Pollack down, speak in whispers and in cliches. Say things she has heard hundreds of times, mindless Republican chants. Then once she has closed her eyes, you can get the muzzle on her and put her down.

Thursday, April 13, 2017, 10:10 p.m.: It's going to be okay, Deborah Pollack. Don't worry. FOX News, lock her up, Trump Pence, Make America Great Again.... See, folks, it's working. She is starting to smile, starting to put away her claws.

Friday, April 14, 2017, 2:44 a.m.: Ha! Friends, it seems that Deborah Pollack has blocked me because I can no longer see any of her insane mumbling. I suppose that means she is either tamed or terrified of me. I claim victory. Another creature has been defeated. Good riddance to Deborah Pollack, a buffoon and a complete turd. It will be a great day when all of her like are silenced. Let us now gather in prayer, and petition the almighty gods and goddesses to remove other such beasts from our beloved planet. Onward! 

A man named Duane Key then interjected:  Michael, I believe its because you're too much of an idiot to try and have a discussion with

I patiently responded to Duane, a petulant bed-wetter and amateur sodomite: No, Duane, she's frightened. She's hiding now. She knows she's defeated, and can't bear to have her nonsense ridiculed any longer. It's likely that she'll stay in hiding for a long time. Perhaps she'll never come back. Perhaps she's huddled in a corner with a plush bunny and a box of cookies and the remote to a television she no longer owns. And maybe she'll scribble some thoughts on the wall of her trailer, and when the doctors come to remove her in the coming years, they might see that writing, and perhaps one will care enough to attempt to decipher it. Or perhaps not. Maybe the doctors will have other things on their minds, and the final mumbling of Deborah Pollack will be lost forever.

Goodbye, Deborah Pollack. 

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 13, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Just because someone is a relative to Donald Trump doesn't necessarily mean that person will be given an important job in the administration. However, today Donald promised Barron Trump his pick of ambassadorships if the child can persuade Melania to move to the White House.

Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Alternative Fact: April 12, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Donald Trump explained that the runways at the Syrian base were never the target, and that's why none of the 59 missiles hit them. He also confirmed that the chemical weapons stockpiles at the base were not targeted. "I targeted the real source of the trouble," Donald said. "I got it from reliable sources - Breitbart, FOX News and my snake Jasper - that the base's cafeteria was where the real trouble was. They served those awful square pizzas, where the cheese comes off in one rubbery clump. That sort of thing is sad and has to be stopped, no matter where in the world it is found, and no matter how much it costs American taxpayers."

Fun With Trump Supporters: We Have To Find Some Use For These People

Many of the so-called Trump supporters on Facebook and Twitter are actually fabrications (like Sasha Petrin, for example). They are not real people. I noticed that the exact same comments (with the exact same spelling and grammatical errors) would show up on various posts. So there are fewer Trump supporters than what a casual glance at Donald's Facebook page might suggest. But the fact that anyone still supports this mendacious prick is alarming and depressing. What I've found is that these people are ignorant, racist morons, who are clinging to this man because he is just like them (except that he is rich and they are not). There is no sense in trying to educate them because they have a tendency to ignore facts. So all we can do is play with them. Nothing wrong with that. Let the games continue!

Becky Anne Wheeler Brown (on Facebook, 3-31-17): "We've got your back President Trump!! We know who the corrupt government is and what their wanting!! Your doing a great job!! We trust you to drain the swamp!!"
My response: "Becky Anne Wheeler Brown, your grasp on the English language is what's wanting here. Let's take a look at what you wrote: 'We've got your back President Trump!! We know who the corrupt government is and what their wanting!! Your doing a great job!! We trust you to drain the swamp!!' Okay, first, you need a comma after 'back.' Then eliminate the second exclamation point. Using more than one exclamation point is a sign of someone not having progressed beyond the fourth grade. Also, please learn the difference between 'their' and 'they're.' And the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' Once you've mastered these basics, please feel free to post your thoughts on Facebook. But until then, keep your asinine thoughts to yourself."

Francis Allen (on Facebook, 3-31-17): "Best President EVER!!! Who would have thought that keeping campaign promises would be such a novelty? It has felt like Christmas morning since President Trump was elected. It just keeps getting better and better! Thank you Mr. President!"
My response: "Francis Allen, I agree! This is just like Christmas morning. Every Christmas, we have certain traditions in my family. First, Santa grabs my sister by the pussy. Then my dad hides his tax returns and calls his friends in Russia. My mom disappears for long periods of time. No affection is shown between my parents, except when other relatives show up later in the day to take photos. My crazy Aunt Kellyanne gets drunk and tells us fantastic tales of terror until my dad tells her to shut up. And when our Mexican neighbors come over to give us baked goods, we lock our door and pretend we can't hear them."

Anne Connors (on Facebook, 3-31-17): "It's all just so good. I'm so sorry we've become a nation of critics. I guess we've just had such horrible leadership, politicians and news for so long we're jaded. But things are on the mend. Thank you President Trump!"
My response: "I agree, Anne! Things are on the mend. Now that we've gotten rid of clean water, education, immigrants, women's health care, and democracy, this country can get back to what's really important: making money." 

Cecile Moore (on Facebook, 4-1-17): " These negative comments about Trumo are ridiculous especially I'm leaching him. He hasn't done anything to warrant impeaching. They need to go after all the Democrats who've been dealing with Russia. .. like Hillary and her uranium deal and her right hand man, Podesta, getting $35 million from them for a business he was involved in while working for Hillary. What about Comey and his letting her off the hook. And now it's come out some HIGH level Obama official is involved with all the surveillance of the Republican candidates. Probably Obama!!! And you're calling for impeach ing Trump. GET A LIFE."
My response: "Cecile, who is Trumo? And what do you mean, you're leaching him? Are you some kind of doctor who time-traveled from a couple of centuries ago? And if you have a time-traveling device, could you use it to go back to November (or even earlier) and get rid of Donald Trump for us? We would all consider you a hero." 

Sharon Love (on Facebook, 4-1-17): "Yeah ok, when all else fails, start with the name calling.... Iam referring to non Trump supporters who do nothing but whine, disrupt, lie, obstruct, collaborate, with the Democratic politicians, who obviously are not serving the american people as a whole by all of the constant, complaining, whining and obstruction.... BTW, the "kool aid" has been shared by those who are blind by the propaganda and brain washing that has spread by the Democrats and establishment elite.....Seems to me, if your not part of the solution, you are part of the problem...."
My response: "Sharon, please learn the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' It seems Trump supporters have a mighty tough time with that one. I'm thinking of holding an online English class exclusively for Trump supporters. Try to get you at least up to, say, the fifth grade reading level." 

Sylvia Petrosky (on Facebook, 4-1-17): "You are doing a good job for America, and I thank you. However, there are a lot of snakes in the swamp of Washington DC, be careful who you trust on both sides of the aisle. Dimms cannot be trusted, and not all republicans can be trusted. I pray for God to give you guidance and discernment. God can be trusted. God bless."
My response: "Sylvia, I've been getting some new information that hints that God actually can't be trusted. I hear God has been talking with some reporters over at the New York Times, and it seems also that God might have been listening in on some of Trump's phone conversations at Trump Tower. I think it's time to lock God up." 

Sam Jacobs (on Facebook, 3-30-17): "Ivanka cops lots of hate from the liberal media - despite being a respectable lifelong member of the Democrats. They eat their own so fast."
My response: "Wait, folks, Sam has a good idea here. Cannibalism. If we actually devour Ivanka, as he suggests, as well as Donald, Melania, Mike Pence, Steve Bannon, Scott Pruitt, Betsy DeVos, Sean Spicer, Kellyanne Conway, then they won't be able to come back. Sure, it's a tough meat to swallow, and we'll likely get sick. But won't it be worth it? They'll be gone for good, and we can get things back to normal." 

Mark Wilfong (on Facebook, 4-3-17): "All these anti Trump people I feel your pain. I know what your going through. I was a victim of presidential genocide myself the last 8 years. I can assure you the pain you feel will leave on the next election just like mine was this past Nov. Now go troll another page. We get it, you don't like him. But that's ok, now you know how we felt. Now suck it up buttercups!!"
My response: "Mark Wilfong, please learn the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' And don't use words like 'genocide' until you've looked them up in a dictionary. Thanks, Mark." 

Cary Caylor (on Facebook, 4-5-17): "Things are getting better already in America... God is back in the picture... family values... Trump is going to make the world a better place .. especially if we are at peace with ex cold war era countries... God is Good...!!!!"
My response: "Cary Caylor, I agree! Things are so much better now that we're getting rid of the environment and national parks and clean air and food for the elderly and public television. I didn't see the picture of God that you mentioned. Could you forward it to me? I was wondering what the old guy looks like now." 

Jeannie Scheihing (on Facebook, 4-5-17): "Thank God for President Trump please God help him take back our country. Praying for you and your beautiful family everyday."
My response: "Jeannie, I was just talking with God, and he told me that he actually thinks Donald Trump is a racist dingbat, and that those people who still support him are deserving of an eternity of punishment. It might just be his mood, you know, but still, I would certainly be wary of voicing support for Trump on Facebook, as God tells me he wastes a lot of time on here reading these comments." 
(I went to Jeannie's Facebook page, and she had all sorts of nonsense on there, including that Barrack Obama's birth certificate had been forged, something a friends of hers named Jim Buzzell put on her page. That led me to post this response directly on her page: "You twits sure have your own version of reality going. Good for you. But please stay the hell out of mine. Thanks.") 

On April 6th, I posted this comment on the Republican Facebook page: "I didn't hate the Republican Party until today. Now I think you're all enemies of democracy."
Derrick McCord's response: "You are an idiot, this man is the most qualified person to be in the supreme court right now. Not republicans fault democrats cant get past losing and election, and this is all about losing."
My response: "Derrick McCord, wow, you bloody moron. If you're going to call someone an 'idiot,' you ought to make sure you don't have all sorts of grammatical errors in your comment. Geez. Derrick, you are exactly the type of dipshit that supports Donald Trump. Good for you."    
My second response: "Also, Derrick, what you said in your error-ridden message is completely incorrect. Someone as stupid as you should probably keep his thoughts to himself." 
Derrick McCord: "Dude really? I'm looking at your facebook, and i see all kinds of grammatical errors'. Lets get back too the point, which is about you being a liberal tard. Instead of coming back with substance to retort my post, you skirt the issue like a classic democrat tweeker, because you have nothing of value to add to this conversation. If you're going to make blank statments, atleast have some form of argument to validate what you said to begin with. Brian Hughes I would love to meet him aswell, shake his hand and what not..... Hahahaha" 
My response: "Yes, really. And no, you have no point. Derrick, you are worthless. I'm not engaging you in a discussion, because I am certain you have nothing of interest to say, to contribute. Believe what you will; it is meaningless. Say what you wish; it is irrelevant. By the way, I think you meant to type 'blanket statements,' not 'blank statments.' But again, you're a moron, so that sort of mistake is to be expected."