Sunday, April 22, 2018

Trump Supporters Are Idiots, Round Ten

Donald Trump is a despicable person who should already be in jail, but likely will be heading there soon. Yet there are those who still like this guy. Supporters of Donald Trump continue to prove themselves to be the absolute worst that humanity has to offer, and utterly incapable of thought. On Facebook, there is a "Donald Trump Fan Club" page, and last night I posted this comment on that page:

"It absolutely amazes and depresses me that anyone would believe a single word uttered by Donald Trump. Trump is a completely dishonest and delusional shithead. If you believe Trump, something is seriously wrong with you. My guess is that you haven't finished junior high school."

Several people responded, and their responses included grammatical errors. One of those who responded and was particularly upset was a man named Fred Rubin. This was his comment:

"Hey mike aka douche bag
Bet You couldn’t finish grade school lol stfu."

Well, I went to Fred's Facebook page, and he had posted how he had been temporarily kicked off of Facebook, but was now back on. Apparently, Fred was completely unaware of security measures for his page, and I was able to comment on his post. That led to the following exchange.

Wednesday, April 18, 2018

Donald Trump And The Great Witch Hunt

     Ever since Donald Trump was a little boy, he’s been terrified of witches. When he was in his teens, a witch cast a disfiguring spell on him, causing his hands to shrink slightly. Some people claimed they couldn’t see the difference, and told him it was all in his mind, but Donald knew the truth. He had tiny hands, and a witch was to blame. More recently, a witch leveled another curse at him, inviting winds to blow his unusual hair right off his head whenever he was outside and cameras were aimed at him.
     “The witches make me look ridiculous,” Donald said. “That’s something that only a witch can do.” He knew it was incredibly difficult to make him look anything other than great, and so whenever he looked anything other than great, witches were to blame.
     Donald knew a lot about witches. In fact, witchcraft was one of the thousands of subjects that he was an expert on. “Witches are tricky,” Donald liked to tell people. “Sometimes they’ll disguise themselves as beautiful, alluring women with knockout knockers.” So of course in that case Donald couldn’t help but want to get his tiny hands on them. And he would just grab them, kiss them, whatever he wanted to do. He knew that later, if they complained about his groping, they were witches. There were plenty of witches about.
     And yet, for some reason, there were people out to get him, rather than out to get the witches. It made no sense. In fact, recently some people broke into his best friend’s house in order to find evidence that Donald was a witch, and that he got help from other witches from Russia, a coven led by his pal Vladimir. People were so caught up in this false witch hunt, that Donald Trump knew the only thing that could refocus their attention and satisfy them would be a real witch hunt. And Donald, though terrified of witches, was just the person to lead it. “I am the greatest witch hunter ever,” he told his pet lizard Kellyanne and his dog Sanders. “Though sometimes you just have to pay off a witch so she won’t shrink your hands further.” Sanders barked her agreement.
     For this witch hunt, Donald Trump knew he would need a little help, and he decided to turn to an old chum, Sean Hannity. Hannity knew a thing or two about paying off witches. And Hannity was someone Donald could trust. After all, years ago Donald and Sean had experimented with farmyard animals together, and Sean never divulged details of those carefree days, not even to the cross-dressed hookers whose favors he often paid for. When Donald called him, Sean agreed to the plan immediately. He knew that a successful hunt of a real witch would make him a hero among a certain segment of the population, and would perhaps help him out of his own public image troubles.
     And so early one morning, Donald and Sean set off on a great adventure. Donald didn’t want to tip off the witches that they were coming, so he had to sneak out of his big white house. He kept reporters busy by sending Sanders the talking dog to stand in front of them at the podium. Donald, of course, knew that Sanders didn’t really talk. The old girl just barked. But he also knew that the reporters would do their best to interpret those barks, and it would keep them occupied for the rest of the day while he went about bagging a witch. He patted Sanders’ head, and gave her a biscuit. “Good girl, Sanders! Good girl!” With the adults thus occupied, Donald and Sean were able to sneak out easily.
     Sean did the driving because sometimes Donald’s tiny hands had trouble grasping the steering wheel. “Where should we look first?” Sean asked.
     Donald thought about all the women who revealed themselves as witches by complaining about his unwanted advances, and said, “New York.”
    “Okay,” Sean responded. “Buckle up.”
     On the drive up, Sean and Donald kept themselves busy by telling each other how great they were, and the time flew by. They were in New York before they knew it. “Wow, that was fast,” Donald said. “I’m not even done telling you how great I am.” Before they stepped out of the car, Donald said: “They love me in this city, but there are lots of witches here. We have to be careful. Let’s use code names so that people won’t recognize us. I will be Giant Hands. You can be Giant Talent. No one will ever guess our real identities.”
     They gave each other a quick kiss for luck and then stepped out onto the busy sidewalk. People rushed by them without giving them so much as a glance.
     “How are we going to tell which ones are witches?” Sean asked. “They all look like witches to me. I mean, none of them are even white.”
     “Well, Giant Hands, there is one way,” Donald began.
     “No, you’re Giant Hands,” Sean corrected. “I’m Giant Talent. Remember?”
     “Oh. Well, Giant Talent, there is one way, one easy way, to tell if a woman is a witch. But to perform this test, I am going to have to reveal to her my true identity.”
     “Is that safe?”
     “It is a risk we must take. For you see, only a witch will spurn my sexual advances. It is because they’re not real women. They’re monsters who must be destroyed.” Sean quickly agreed, but felt overwhelmed by the sheer number of women on the streets of New York. However, luck was on their side that day, for the very first woman they confronted turned out to be a witch.
     They chose a dark-haired beauty because Donald said, “Anyone who looks like Ivanka is going to be attracted to me and therefore not a witch.” This woman was dressed all in black, but that wasn’t enough to make Donald confident that she was a witch. In fact, for a moment Donald hoped she wasn’t a witch. “This girl is hot,” Donald whispered to Sean. “Not as hot as Ivanka, but still very hot.”
     “Don’t worry, Donald, I will be ready,” Sean told him.
    Donald stepped in front of the woman and said, “Hi, I’m Donald Trump.” He then grabbed her by the pussy. The woman screamed and tried to hit him with her purse, but Sean was on that witch like a shot, forcing a large canvas sack over her head.
     “I’ve got her!” Sean exclaimed.
     “Great!” Donald shouted. “Now let’s get her back to D.C. before Sanders really does start talking.”
     When they arrived at the press briefing room, Sanders was still keeping the reporters busy. “Here, girl,” Trump whispered, and tossed a red rubber ball into the hallway. Sanders bounded after it, and Donald took her place at the podium.
     “Ladies and gentlemen of the press,” he began. “For a long time now I have been the unfair target of a witch hunt. Most of you know this is ridiculous, since only women can be witches. Still, the unfair attack has continued. Until now.” Donald paused for dramatic effect. “For today, with the help of Sean Hannity, I – the greatest witch hunter the world has ever seen – have captured a witch.” He motioned for Sean Hannity to come forward. Sean dragged the large canvas bag over to the podium. “Today I give the American people what they want: a real, live –”
     Sean interrupted Donald, whispering something in his ear.
     “No? Suffocated in the trunk?” Donald said. “Well, it was a long drive. And we did stop for those burgers. And those other burgers.” He then turned back to the cameras. “I give the American people a real witch.” Sean then dumped the witch’s body onto the floor next to the podium. The reporters gasped, and then they all applauded. Donald Trump was once again their hero.

Photo From Work

Here is a photo from the parking lot when I arrived to work yesterday morning.

I wish I had also taken a photo of the friendly giraffe I saw when I returned to the parking lot at the end of the day.

Monday, April 16, 2018

My Troubles With AT&T: Update April 16, 2018

As you may recall, I've been having trouble with AT&T over my bill. The short version is that I was promised that both my February and March bills would be $0 because of the ongoing trouble with my service. The problem is that Patrick, the employee who promised the bills would be $0, didn't properly document the call. Or, perhaps, he did, but that documentation has been lost somehow since then. After speaking with several people over the past month, I learned that all calls are recorded. For some reason, no one ever bothered to listen to the recording of the call I made on March 12th (the fateful call with Patrick). So last week I was promised (by a man named Adam) that recording would be found, and that I would hear back.

Before I get to the latest from today, here is more information from the 13th (scroll down if you wish to skip this part, about yet more repairs to the line):

April 13, 2016
  • 3:03 p.m.  – I get a call from the technician. He says he’ll be here in twenty minutes. But he’s not an outside technician. I said specifically yesterday that the problem will be outside, but AT&T sent me an inside guy. Perfect. He says his own tests on my line have shown everything in working order, and that he’s not sure what he’ll be able to do, but he’s on his way nonetheless.
  • 3:38 p.m. – Still no sign of the technician. I suppose you could say he’s only fifteen minutes late, as he said he’d be here in twenty minutes thirty-five minutes ago. But, really, he’s an hour and thirty-eight minutes late, as I was told he’d be here between noon and 2 p.m. Plus, it sounds like he won’t be able to do anything anyway. So I am likely waiting around for no reason whatsoever.
  • 3:46 p.m. – The technician, Michael, arrives. He is a seriously nice guy, and gives me back a bit of my faith in AT&T. He says the tests he’s run have all come up positive, and that it’s an old building with copper wiring, saying that they can’t replace the wiring in the building because of course AT&T doesn’t own the building. Still, he makes at least one adjustment on the box outside, and gives me his card. I joke with him that I am trying to collect the entire set of AT&T technicians cards, like baseball cards. I am optimistic that my service will not be interrupted, at least for a while. Unless of course AT&T simply shuts off my service because of a lack of communication regarding my bill. I have not heard back from Adam. And it’s Friday. So, does that mean nothing will happen until Monday?
April 16, 2018
I haven’t heard back from Adam, and in today’s mail was a notice from AT&T that my service will shut off on the 19th if the bill isn’t paid. What the hell? These guys are terrible. So I make yet another call to AT&T.
  • 4:49 p.m. – I call AT&T, and am almost immediately put on hold, before even reaching an actual person.
  • 5:08 p.m. – I am still on hold. This time music plays (last time there was just silence). One song which has already played several times through. I am beginning to really hate this instrumental piece. Will anyone answer?
  • 5:11 p.m. – The song is starting again. All I need to do is tell them to put a hold on any charges until the managers listen to the tapes of that elusive March 12th phone call. Why is this so difficult? I sent messages to AT&T via Twitter, but those have been ignored, as were my previous messages. Am I being ignored again here?
  • 5:14 p.m. – The song begins again. Is anyone still there? Has the office closed without bothering to notify those already on hold?
  • 5:17 p.m. – The song starts again, and I am beginning to give up hope of ever reaching anyone. What the hell, AT&T? I’ve been on hold for nearly half an hour.
  • 5:20 p.m. – Still no one is answering, and the song has started yet again. I feel that AT&T is now deliberately torturing me, the bastards.
  • 5:24p.m. – The song is starting again. Is the song getting longer? Weird. Time is stretching out and I am no longer a part of reality. I’ve entered another dimension where nothing ever happens.
  • 5:25 p.m. – Finally someone answers. His name is Hero (badge # CO385P – that an O as Oscar, not a zero), and he promises me he will be my hero. Who knows? Perhaps he will. I tell him about the notice that I just received, and explain that while I am waiting for a problem to be resolved I want to make sure that my service isn’t shut off. That’s all.
  • 5:30 p.m. – He applies an extension and assures me that my service won’t be shut off. At least, until May 3rd. If the problem hasn’t been resolved by then, I should call back. I thank him for his help, and express hope that the issue will be resolved before then.
  • 5:31 p.m. – The call ends.

Friday, April 13, 2018

My Troubles With AT&T: Update April 13, 2018

Because AT&T so far refuses to honor a promise that was made to me by one of its employees regarding my bill (actually, more than one made the promise), I feel a need to document every development, to keep a record and to make it public, so that the company too can review it. Yesterday I posted an update, with some information on the employee’s promise to me, and on the latest communications I had with the company. Click here to read that. And now here is today’s update.
  • 9:33 a.m. –  Adam calls just to say he’s waiting for approval to look for the recording of the March 12th call, and that he’ll call me back with an update later.
  • 12:19 p.m. – An automated message from AT&T is left on my home phone’s answering machine. “This is an important call from AT&T regarding your account,” the message begins. It goes on to ask me to call their 1-800 number, not a direct line or anything. No details are given on what the call is about. My guess is it has nothing to do with the ongoing problems, and is rather just a reminder to pay what AT&T sees as an overdue bill. (I didn’t answer because I have a personal rule to never answer or respond to a call made by a recording. I demand interactions with real people.)
  • 1:37 p.m. – I receive a text message from AT&T: “AT&T Alert: We may not arrive by 2PM.” Sam, the technical support guy I spoke with yesterday, assured me a technician would be here between noon and 2 p.m. today. Now, who knows? The text message tells me to type “KEEP” if I still want the guy to come out today. But when I typed “Keep,” I got this response: “Message + would like to send a message to 883773. This may cause charges on your mobile account.” What the hell? So I didn’t reply at all. The other option was to type “STOP” if I wanted to cancel the appointment. Since I am not typing either, I assume the guy will come out here, especially as I had told AT&T I didn’t want to receive any text messages in the first place.
  • 2:02 p.m. – Clearly, the repairman won’t make it here within that two-hour window, as we are two minutes past that now. Will he or she come at all? I have other things I need to do, but I am stuck here, even though I’m sure all the work that is necessary will be done at the box outside.
  • 2:07 p.m. – Also, I have not heard back from Adam with regards to the bill.

Thursday, April 12, 2018

My Troubles With AT&T: Update April 12, 2018 Part 2

I've been having problems with AT&T for a couple of years, with intermittent service to my landline and internet, with repeated problems with the bills also. But the past few months, it has gotten much, much worse. February was so bad, that one of the service people promised me that my bill would be $0 for the month. When the bill arrived, it was for $76.11. On March 12th, I called AT&T to discuss that problem, as well as a problem with my service. Because, even after technicians had come out again, my connection got worse. In fact, I had no service whatsoever - no landline, no internet - on March 12th. The man I spoke with on the morning of March 12th, whose name is Patrick (he did not give his last name), promised me he had fixed that bill, and it was $0. And he promised me that my next bill would likewise be $0, since I still had no service. I made him confirm both of those things four times before transferring me to a technician. 

But it turns out that Patrick did not fix either bill, and did not document the call at all, as the people I've spoken with since then have told me they can find no documentation of the call. Strange, since the technicians did come out soon after that. One thing I despise is dishonesty, and I feel that AT&T is being dishonest with me. Now, the thing they're doing here that I find even more infuriating is that AT&T is accusing me of lying. They're implying that since they have no note of the conversation, that the conversation must not have taken place. I of course have the conversation noted, but in effect I am being told that AT&T does not believe me.

I decided to make one last attempt to resolve the situation before going to the Better Business Bureau, and maybe switching phone companies. So here are notes from the phone call I made today, which began at 2:25 p.m. and ended at 4:03 p.m.

  • I call at 2:25p.m.
  • I reach a real person at 2:26. Rachel (who said her ID number is B-zero-B). She would not give me her last name. I asked.
  • I explain the problem in some detail. I can't even begin to guess how many AT&T employees have heard this story already.
  • Rachel tells me the only way they can fix the problem, the only way they can give me what I was promised, is if it was properly documented. But that is the problem. Patrick failed to document our conversation; at least that's what I've been told by several people since then. I had him confirm that he’d documented it four times before he transferred me to technical support, but he apparently still failed to do.
  • At 2:31 p.m., Rachel puts me on hold to check the documentation. This is after she told me that every single call is recorded. What happened to the recording of the call I had on March 12th? I wonder.
  • At 2:47 p.m., I get fed up with her saying the charges are sustained because of lack of documentation, and I ask her to transfer me to her supervisor.
  • I am put on hold at 2:47 p.m. There is no music or anything, and after a couple of minutes I wonder if she’s simply hung up on me. Customer service could not possibly be worse. By the way, she kept calling me “Mr. Michael,” until finally I said, “Michael is my first name.”
  • At 2:52 p.m., suddenly there is a one-second burst of music, then nothing again. So my messages have been ignored on Twitter. The promises to me were not documented or kept. I’m told that all calls are recorded, but for some reason they cannot find the 1 hour 24 minute conversation I had with Patrick and technicians on March 12th. And now they’re just leaving me on hold, ignoring me again. I’ve never been treated so poorly by any company.
  • It is 2:58 p.m. I’ve been on hold for eleven minutes. No one has come on to let me know how long the wait might be. No one has given any indication whatsoever that they are even aware that I am on hold or that they have any intention of picking up. How long am I supposed to remain on hold? Is my time not important?
  • At 3:05 p.m., I hear a bit of music, and then a ringing, and I am hopeful that perhaps someone will answer.
  • At 3:08 p.m., Adam (ID or Badge # 169994) answers and tells me they’ll investigate the issue. Apparently no one has searched for the recording of that March 12th call, although several people have told me that they were unable to find it. So, anyway it is not documented that anyone searched for that recording. Did they just tell me they couldn't find it without actually looking for it? Or did they look for it, fail to find it, and then fail to document that they searched for it?
  • Adam keeps telling me that my current bill is due on the 16th. I explain that my past bill and current bill are both $0, and that I will not, under any circumstances, pay even one cent. I also tell him that because of the interruption in my service last night that my next bill should be adjusted accordingly. He seems to think I mean the current bill. I tell him to forget the current bill for a moment, that I am now talking about the next bill. 
  • At 3:42 p.m., I tell Adan I have to get off the phone soon because I have to pee. But first we need to schedule yet another technician since my service cut out last night.
  • At 3:43 p.m. I am put on hold yet again. I really need to pee.
  • At 3:45 p.m., Adam says he is transferring me to technician now. Also, he says he made the adjustment to my next bill regarding last night’s interruption in service. I want to believe him, but who knows? Also, I am about to burst. I am put on hold again
  • At 3:48 p.m., hurrah, the cord stretches to the bathroom. Relieved, though still on hold.
  • At 3:49 p.m., Sam from technical support says he’s going to run some line tests. I am put on hold again.
  • At 3:57 p.m., Sam confirms there is a problem with the line, and says he will send out a technician.
  • At 4:02 p.m., he sets up an appointment with a technician for tomorrow.
  • At 4:03 p.m., I finally hang up.

My Troubles With AT&T: Update, April 12, 2018

It seems now that the folks running the AT&T Twitter page are no longer responding to my messages. I spoke with Juan, a social media specialist for the company, on the phone on April 3rd, a conversation that lasted more than a half hour, and which he assured me was recorded (you see, AT&T is claiming that they can’t find the recordings in which the solution to the problems with my bill was offered). Juan also told me he’d play the recording for his supervisor, and that that supervisor would get back to me within a few hours. He or she did not do so.

So on April 4th, I sent this message: “Hello again. I never heard from the supervisor, and today received a new AT&T bill. I'm not going to open it. And I don't really have any more time this week to deal with this. Please let me know it has been settled. I owe $0.”
No response from anyone at AT&T.

On April 9th, I sent this message through Twitter: “I still haven't heard from a supervisor. This has to be settled today. Tomorrow I call the Better Business Bureau and begin spreading my woes about how this has been handled.”
No response from AT&T. I didn’t have time to contact the Better Business Bureau, and of course would prefer for AT&T to resolve the problem, as was promised to me repeatedly.

Early yesterday I sent this message: “I never heard back. Does that mean everything has been fixed?”
No response from AT&T.
So last night I sent this message: “Are you guys no longer responding to my messages? Hello? My internet and phone cut out several minutes ago, and just came back on. So the problem isn't even fixed. I don't want to receive a bill until I have a month of uninterrupted service. Is that too much to ask for?”
No response from AT&T.

The Twitter handle is ATTCares. So today I sent this message: “ATT Cares? Really?”
No response.

So now I will attempt to get a hold of someone else at AT&T who will finally solve the problem. However, there is also a new problem; or rather, an old problem acting up again. My phone and internet cut out again last night for several minutes. This is the problem that I’ve had since February of 2016. I think I’ve met every AT&T technician at some point during the past two years. Anyway, I am going to call now. Stay tuned…