Alternative Fact: August 5, 2017

Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): At his most recent self-love rally, Donald Trump claimed victory in the war on "beautiful clean coal," a war which claimed the lives of more than fifteen billion people last year alone. Now that the war is finally over, Time Life Books is putting together a twenty-volume series detailing every important skirmish, with portraits of many of the generals and foot soldiers who lost their lives in heroic coal fights.