Life Of Ian

      Ian Douglas was able to read minds. Unfortunately, he lived in Kentucky and so died without ever knowing he possessed such a rare gift.

 

(Copyright 2022 Michael Doherty)

(Note: When I first heard about two-sentence stories, I thought, "Ridiculous." Then I thought, "I wonder if I could write one." And then I forgot all about it. But while at work today, I wrote this little story. It made a coworker laugh, and it made my girlfriend laugh. I hope it will make you laugh as well. One other thing: like any other story, it took a few drafts to get it right.)

People Are Getting Dumber Every Day

The owner of the red car hasn't quite grasped the concept of parallel parking.

Photos From Outside A Questionable Massage Business

The other day I saw this sign on the door for a massage parlor.

Now setting aside the fact that nearly two months have passed since New Year’s Day and the sign should have been removed by now, what on Earth compelled the person who made this sign to alert patrons that the establishment will also be closed three years ago? Strange.

While pondering that for a moment, I then noticed the more professional-looking sign in the window to the right of the door.

Three things about this sign made me chuckle. The first was the fact that the place claims to specialize in men and women, making one wonder what sorts of folks they don’t specialize in. Clearly, whoever made the sign does not know the definition of the word “specialize.” The second thing, of course, is “Deeep Tissue.” You’d think someone would have caught that. And then, if misspellings aren’t your thing, this place also offers “Deep Tissue.” How thoughtful. It’s like they caught the error, but rather than correcting it, just added the correctly spelled word below. That, as you might have guessed, was the third thing that gave me a laugh. And yes, I also noticed “Couple Massage,” but it did not make me chuckle, just annoyed and depressed me.