I'm trying to keep my sense of humor, which is difficult these days, as you know. One way I've found to have a little fun and blow off some steam is responding to some of the crazy shit that Trump supporters post online. Here are a few of the many comments I've posted.
Angel Serenity (on Facebook, 2-4-17): They
may try to stand in the way, but the Trump Train is comming through, so
it's best to not stand on the tracks it wont be stopped.
My response: Angel,
you probably meant to type "coming," not "comming." And "won't," not
"wont." And you probably meant to put some sort of punctuation after
My second response: Angel,
I stand corrected. I took a look at your Facebook page, and you're
clearly a moron. So I'm certain now you didn't mean to type "coming" or
"won't," and that you would have no idea what sort of punctuation would
be applicable after "tracks." Sorry.
Madonna Dixon (on Facebook, 2-4-17): I
did not realize how divided obummer made AMERICA until you started
trying to put AMERICA back together again!!!!!!!!!!!! WAKE UP AMERICA,
BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My response: Madonna
Dixon, you must really mean what you say. Look at all those exclamation
points! So many of them! Clearly, you are a very passionate person, and
easily excitable. I don't think I've ever seen so many exclamation
points. And all those capital letters too. Wow, you really want people
to wake up. I can't imagine they won't listen to you, what with all
those exclamation points.
Sher Starr (on Facebook, 2-4-17): Don't
give up or give in! I am a single mom and an under-employed school
teacher in California, and I gave to your campaign (which I have never
done before) and with all my heart I have to believe and pray that you
are God's man for this hour!!! I am praying for you daily, sir!
My response: You're a teacher? That's frightening and depressing.
Charlotte Blevins (on Facebook, 2-4-17): Please
stay the course! You're perfect! I'm trying to help by joining Air
Force Nat'l Guard to keep America and her President safe!
My response: Poor
Charlotte. So confused. Do you really think Donald Trump is perfect? Do
you recall this wonderful thing he said: "I moved on her like a bitch.
But I couldn’t get there. And she was married. Then all of a sudden I
see her, she’s now got the big phony tits and everything. She’s totally
changed her look....I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start
kissing her. You know, I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just
start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait.
And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab
’em by the pussy. You can do anything."
Tony Paschal (on Facebook, 2-4-17): Its
going to be a real fight to save this country, but let the fight begin.
Can you imagine how far left into the Abyss this country would have
slipped under Hillary. Trump is a little gruff and makes leftest heads
pop, but God answered my prayers with his arrival. Fight the good fight
My response: Tony, you prayed for a racist, abusive, narcissistic, mendacious, misogynist twit?
Dave Hensley (on Facebook, 2-6-17): Doing an excellent job President Trump were 100% behind you and thanks for all that you're doing God bless you and your family
My response: Dave,
you probably meant to type something like this: "Doing an excellent
job, President Trump. We're 100% behind you. Thanks for all that you're
doing. God bless you and your family." You might want to proofread your
nonsense before posting it. I mean, you don't want people to think
you're an idiot, do you?
Linda Lewis-Weissinger (on Facebook, 2-6-17): Mr
President don't focus on this crap. That is Satan's way of distracting
you from important matters. Focus on on Creators plan. Praying for you
to stay Focused
My response: Satan's
way? Are you completely off your rocker? If any of Linda's neighbors or
friends are paying attention, please go help her with her medication.
She's speaking gibberish again. Oh, poor Linda, it might be another trip
to the loony bin for you. Good luck.
Helen Ann Mason (on Facebook, 2-6-17): Dear
Lord please protect Our President Donald Trump from all the crazy
people liberals and Democrats Please let him do his job peacefully to
help make America great!He gave up so much to do this for all of us!!!
My response: Gave
up so much? Helen, what are you on about now? Have you gone mad? What
precisely did he give up? Seriously, I want to know what you think this
rich, mendacious narcissist gave up. And this has nothing to do with
Republicans vs. Democrats. Trump was registered as both. He has no
ideology. He only cares about himself. He couldn't give a shit about
you, Helen. He'd push you in front of a train if it would help him in
some way. He'd do the same to Melania. He is incapable of compassion or
Brittany Cobgill (on Facebook, 2-6-17): Thank
you Trump!! So many people absolutely love you! Don't worry about what
all the crazy people are saying and lead our country. We know you are a
good man! Pray for everyday!
My response: Brittany,
do you really believe Donald is "a good man"? Do you remember this
little nugget that he uttered: "I moved on her like a bitch. But I
couldn’t get there. And she was married. Then all of a sudden I see her,
she’s now got the big phony tits and everything. She’s totally changed
her look....I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her.
You know, I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start
kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when
you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab ’em by the
pussy. You can do anything." Are those the words and thoughts of a good
Kat Barret (on Facebook, 2-6-17): Happy
Birthday, President Trump! May God lead and guild you, and give you
wisdom each day. May God finish the good work He has begun in you, and
bless you with His peace, strengthen you, and keep you as you navigate
through deep waters.
My response: I
don't understand how the religious people can get behind Donald Trump.
He's on his, what, third marriage. He's cheated on previous wives, raped
one wife, bragged about abusing other women. He is certainly not a
moral person. So why the support? Seriously. Tell me why.
(Kat Barret did not respond, but an idiot named Cindi James did.)
(A side note: Kat Barret is also wrong about it being Donald Trump's birthday on February 6th. Donald's birthday is in June.)
Cindi James: Michael
Doherty , we support President Trump because he is a whole hella lot
better than that traitor Barack Obummer, at least he loves America and
American's more than foreigner's like Obummer did, at least he wants to
keep our Country safe, unlike Obummer
did, and at least he don't give away our hard earned tax dollars to
foreigner's like Obummer did, and at least he believes in saving babies
from being slaughtered like Obummer did, and at least he wants to put
God and the Bible back in the Schools unlike Obummer did, I can go on
and on.....JOHN 8:7 'Let him who is without sin, cast the first stone"
My response to Cindi: Cindi,
you might recall that Donald was not running against Obama. And don't
type childish nonsense like "Obummer." That makes you seem like even
more of an idiot than you likely are.
My second response to Cindi James: Cindi
James, you're clearly a mess. Your lack of basic language skills makes
me question whether you had any schooling whatsoever, so perhaps it's
easy to understand how you could be so easily swayed by someone like
My third response: So,
is there anyone who is religious and who supported Trump who can
actually put a sentence together? If so, please explain to me how you
can support Donald Trump. We've already heard from the absolutely
moronic group. Thank you, Cindi James. Now let's hear from the others.
But of course it was Cindi that again responded.
Cindi James: Michael
Doherty , I am not religious, I am a Christian, there is a difference,
religion is following a set of rules, usually man-made rules,
Christianity is having a relationship with Jesus Christ, it's obvious
you are uneducated in the things of God, it
would takes me days, perhaps years to teach you, a good place for you
to start is the Holy Bible, that is if you even believe there is a God,
in which case if you don't, then I can't help you.
My response to Cindi James: Cindi James, again, completely beside the point. But thanks for playing, Miss Non-religious Christian.
Ryan Wicks (on Facebook, 2-6-17): I have compiled a list of everyone who supports Trump, and everyone who doesn't.
For Trump: Common sense Americans
Not for Trump: Facists, and Casey Anthony
Which list are you on?
My response: Ryan,
did you spend a lot of time making your list? Hours? Days? Is your list
the result of hundreds of hours of thought and research? Is this as
creative and clever as anyone on Earth can ever hope you to be? Ryan, is
this your proudest moment? Are your teachers coming out now to claim
you as a successful example of their work? Will you be showing this list to
your children and grandchildren in the coming years? Have you framed
your list yet? Does it hold a special place in your home? Do neighbors
stop by to stare at it in awe and wonder? Will your list get you a guest
spot on a local news program? Ryan, you are a special boy. (By the way, you misspelled "fascists.")
Shanish Ujoodha (on Facebook, 2-7-17): No
one is more hated than he who speak the the Truth!!! Where are the
silent majority supporting Donald J. Trump??Trump is a fighter & he
needs you! Do not show weaknesses to your enemies,oppose them!! Voice
out & support Trump!!! Make America great & safe Again!!!
My response: Donald
Trump has yet to speak the truth on any subject. He is completely full
of shit. Follow him if you want, but be honest about the man you are
following. Know that he is only out for himself. He doesn't care about
you at all. You can still follow him, of course, but don't kid
yourselves. And don't feed the rest of us any bullshit. We've had it.
Daryl Wiebe (on Facebook, 2-10-17): He
talks to people. He listens to people. All kinds of people regardless
of how much money they have in their pocket. This is a very different
kind of president. He sincerely cares.
My response: Daryl
Wiebe, are you completely off your rocker? He listens to people who
aren't rich? Where did you hear that one? Or are you just a lunatic?
Donald cares about just one person: Donald. If you have something good
to say about Donald, there is a chance he will listen to you. But, let's
face it, you have to be rich and have something good to say about
Marla Turnbow (on Facebook, 2-10-17): Remember
President Trump, there is more than one way to skin a cat, getter done,
we are behind you 110% thank you for trying to keep us safe.
My response: Marla, you are not 110% behind him. That is actually impossible. And what kind of nonsense is "getter done"? Are you a moron?
Erica Mouzakis (on Facebook, 2-10-17): I
pray for you everyday Mr. President. I will keep on praying for you to
be safe and to succeed. God bless you and your beautiful family!
My response: You
might also consider praying for the woman he likely raped, and for all
of those he ripped off with his fake university. And how about praying
for the black people that he refused housing with the real estate that
he owns? Do you pray for them too? You might also want to pray for the
families that are being torn apart after immigration raids occurred in
southern California. And you might really consider praying for the
refugees he wants to turn away from our country. They are going to need
to your prayers.
Lydia Frescaz (on Facebook, 2-10-17): Angers
me that the rights of the terrorist are above us the citizens, this is
wrong. I don't want them here, they have plans to destroy our country,
we need to protect our children, our females and the poor sheep and
goats for they are crying too.
My response: Lydia,
poor Lydia, I think you're mixing your medicines again. Also, how many
females do you own? Are you talking about people, or some other animal?
It's difficult to tell with you, what with your strange empathy for the
depressed sheep and goats. Lydia, I believe you are representative of a
great number of the Trump supporters, in as much as it is clear you're a
total nut. Take care of yourself, Lydia, because it's unlikely the sad
sheep and goats will visit you in the home.
Jay Kestler (on Facebook, 2-10-17): Enjoy
yourself this weekend mr.president. We know you will come out swinging
Monday morning. Your doing a great job and starting to win people over.
My response: Oh,
he's a swinger, all right. He has children from three different women.
By the way, Jay, it's "you're doing a great job," not "your doing a
great job." You might want to read over your silliness before posting
it. Okay, Sugar Pie?
Rhonda L. Castellanos (on Facebook, 2-10-17): Mr.
President I continue to pray for you and all the people of the
Whitehouse. I'm in California and voted for you with many people hear.
We support you and are proud of you. Praying that the house will start
backing you up and your temporary ban passes.
My response: Rhonda,
Rhonda, where do I begin? Let's start with the difference between
"hear" and "here." Now, you said "voted for you with many people hear,"
but that just makes no sense at all. "Hear" indicates perception through
the ears. There are other definitions, but I don't want to further
confuse you. You meant "with many people here," as in the place where
you live. Also, the White House is not one word. You wrote "Whitehouse,"
and that is just wrong. Wrong, Rhonda. What your lack of control of the
language indicates is that you, Rhonda, are an idiot. Now, that doesn't
mean you're a bad person, or that you won't be able to lead a
fulfilling life. Many idiots do quite well for themselves. But it does
mean that you should stop voicing your opinions. Good luck and shut up,
Janise Anthony (on Facebook, 2-10-17): I
love how you reach out to America with our post, comments and tweets.
We feel more included in the process of MAKING AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!....
One day at a time and before we know it we are there!
(Note: at the end of Janise's post, she included three hearts and three smiling faces.)
My response: Hearts
and smiling faces? At first I thought you were an adult. My mistake.
Hi, 12-year-old girl, did you mean "your" in place of "our"? And you
probably meant "posts," not "post." Unless Donald reached out to America
with some wooden post that you and your family have. Did that happen,
Bob Strom (on Ivanka Trump's Facebook page, 2-12-17): I
just want you to know that you are admired and appreciated and loved by
many more people than you could imagine. You are an awesome example
for young ladies to look up to. Keep up the good work. Praying for you
and your family and of course your Dad.
My response: More people than she can imagine? I think she can imagine twenty people.
Theresa Brooks (on Facebook, 2-13-17): you
have opened the eyes of so many. now you have to battle them with their
lunacy!! They are saying Mr Trump has a Mental Disorder and is unfit to
be POTUS. Unbelievable what they will stoop to.
My response: Trump
is a delusional narcissist. It is true. That is why he is obsessed with
everyone liking him, with how many votes he received, with the number
of people attending his inauguration, and so on. He is completely
My second response: And what do you mean, "battle them with their lunacy"? Use someone's insanity as your own weapon?
Jane Keeney (on Facebook, 2-13-17): I
am behind you 110 %. Praying for your protection and wisdom that you
need. Also praying for our nation to come together and support you.
My response: Jane,
you can't be behind him 110%. That is actually impossible. And no, the
nation will not support him, because he is a delusional narcissist
without any ability to lead. He is a man who cares only about himself,
and he and his family are using the office of the president to
A woman named Meagan Dennis Redmund responded.
Meagan Dennis Redmund: Really
Michael Doherty....so why is he not taking a salary, vowed no vacation
days, and has already made good on just about all his campaign promises
(in less than 4 weeks in office)?..... Not sure how thats
narcissistic...do you know what the word means?
Maybe you should look it up because the definition actually fits Obama
to a T.... Always having to be right (his little tantrum when his sup
court nom didn't get confirmed), leaving a statue of himself in the oval
office, and filling positions of power with people tied to terrorists
organizations.... Interesting reads...you might want to do some research
to see if what your being fed is actually fact or propaganda...just a
Meagan Dennis Redmund: Oh and Michael Doherty the nation ELECTED HIM.....
My response to Meagan: Meagan,
are you kidding me? He is a narcissist. His biggest concern is how many
people love him. That's why he is obsessed with just how many votes he
got, and how many people were at his inauguration, and so on. I mean, he
lies about this shit, like it matters. But that's the thing - it
matters to him. Nothing matters more. And yes, his family is profiting.
Melania's lawsuit is all about the millions she says she should make
from her position. And what about promoting Ivanka's clothing line, for
fuck's sake? Meagan, seriously, open your eyes.
My second response to Meagan: Oh,
and the nation didn't elect him. He did not win the popular vote. He
got in because the electoral college did not do its job. And let's not
forget Russia's part in all of this.
(Meagan is at least slightly unbalanced. This is what she has as her introduction on her own Facebook page: "I'm a chosen follower of Christ, a daughter of the KING and TRUMP IS MY PRESIDENT!")
Jane Keeney did reply.
Jane Keeney: Michael Doherty I just say lets come together and lets just give the guy a chance.
Jane Kenney: Michael Doherty 110 per cent is just a figure of speech, Mike.
Lisa Williams (on Facebook, 2-13-17): Don't bail out CA until the agree to stops spending our money on sanuaury cities!
My response: Lisa Williams, what the hell does "sanuaury" mean? Is that an alternative word?
My second response: Also, the what? I think you left out a noun, dear. You might want to proofread your silly messages before posting them.
Lisa Williams: Michael if it makes YOU feel better! I changed it! Lol.
After I sent that response, she did amend her post, changing "sanuaury"
to "sanctuary," but did not put a noun after "the." And of course, this post has its own problems. Why is "I changed it!" a separate sentence? And of course "Lol" is just bullshit.)
Nicholas Speer (on Facebook, 2-13-17): You
just hate a president who believes in capitalism and working class
Americans , you all should be ashamed of yourselves for sticking up for
illegal immigrants and terrorists who have no legal right to be in
country unless we say so .Shame on you all
My response: Nicholas, any relation to Albert Speer?
Sue Davis (on Facebook, 2-14-17): Thank
you for starting the repeal Obamacare!! Glad to see it go!!! The
biggest ponzi scheme ever!! It was designed to destroy the American
My response: Yes, designed to destroy the dream of being sick and not being able to afford a doctor. We've all had that dream, right?
Judy Moore Perez (on Facebook, 2-14-17): They
will try to drive you crazy, stay on course, clean house and remember
we voted for you, yes, an overwhelming number of stated voted for you.
Not journalist or extremists.
My response: Right.
Not journalists, extremists, intelligent people, educated people. But
yes, an overwhelming number of racist, fearful, horrible people did
vote for Donald Trump. Not a majority, of course. Or even close. In
fact, he lost the popular vote by an incredible amount. But yes, a lot
of stupid people voted for him, and he should remember that. You are so
right, Judy Moore Perez.
Wael Zoorob (on Facebook, 2-14-17): Thank you GOD for sending us the Savior (president Trump).
you president Trump for Protecting the United States Of America !!!!!!!
I think it is time to show all the world that they must respect the USA
that Obama Destroyed !! It is time to show the worl that they must
respect the American flag.
My response: So,
Wael, you worship the narcissistic, racist, pussy-grabbing, abusive,
moronic, delusional, criminal, mendacious shithead? And no, the worl
(whatever that is - did you mean to type "world," idiot?) does not need
to respect the U.S. flag. The worl (you should really learn to
proofread) does not belong to the U.S.