Friday, March 31, 2017

Fun With Trump Supporters: The Game Just Won't End

While I do believe it's pointless to try to engage Trump supporters in intelligent conversation (they are incapable of it), I also believe we can have a bit of fun by responding to some of their nonsense. There is no harm in spending a small portion of one's day ridiculing these creatures. Just keep in mind that you will not change their minds. They have no minds to change. So do it solely for the enjoyment.

Sue Jurski (on Facebook, 3-14-17): "Hmm another woman in the cabinet of this 'woman hater' Thank you Mr President."
My response: "He doesn't hate women. He loves them. That is, he loves to grab them by the pussy. And he loves to spy on them while they're changing. And let's be clear. He doesn't just love women. He loves girls too. Young girls. Even ten-year-old girls he sees as potential future dates."
Suzanne Kuzbyt's response: "Michael D. you are creepy weird. I think you just described yourself! POS trailer trash gutter rat!"
My response: "Suzanne Kuzbyt, I guess you've forgotten the footage of him talking about a ten-year-old as a potential date. Also, the 14-year-olds he directly told he'd be dating soon. And maybe you forgot about his delightful pussy-grabbing speech in which he bragged about hitting on a married woman. Also, his creepy comments about his daughter. Don't worry, Suzanne, I will remind you of these things from time to time."
My second response: "Friends (yes, I'm including you, Suzanne), you may have also forgotten that his first wife accused him of rape, as did another woman more recently, a woman who only withdrew her accusation after receiving multiple death threats. So, yes, Donald Trump has a lot of respect for women. Keep telling yourselves that, and ignore all the information to the contrary." 

Dorothy Cain (on Facebook, 3-14-17): "I just wish that all the people in America could appreciate everything your administration are doing for us. Thank you President Trump."
My response: "Dorothy, I agree! Why can't all the people appreciate what Donald and his gang are doing? Don't they see he's doing it all for them? Destroying public education and undermining the EPA and golfing and lying and being rude to journalists and golfing and taking away our health care and golfing and trying to get people to buy his daughter's clothing line - this is all done for the people's benefit. Why can't they appreciate that?" 
Dorothy Cain: "Michael Doherty It is pathetic that you and the rest of the crazies are so mean spirited. You need to pay attention to your own lives and get a life. Have a nice day. Sad"
My response: "Dorothy Cain, wait, I should pay attention to my life and then get it? Shouldn't I get a life first, and then pay attention to it? And what exactly is mean-spirited about what I typed? Pointing out horrible things that Donald is doing is mean-spirited? So, you think he should just be able to do whatever he wants and not be criticized? Dorothy, you're a regular fascist, that's what you are." 

Cristi McCracken (on Facebook, 3-14-17): "We love you President Trump!!! They have to try and make you look bad because you make all of them look bad. We are behind you Mr President and very grateful for your enthusiasm and service!"
My response: "Cristi, you are right! The liberals are making Trump look bad. Why can't they quit quoting him and repeating the awful things he says? They're doing that just to make him look bad. And they should stop pointing out his lies. Don't they know that doing that makes him look bad? And stop pointing out that he tapes his neckties together. And don't photograph his hair in the wind. And stop photographing his utter lack of regard or affection for his wife. That also makes him look bad. Cristi, why can't they just stop making him look bad?" 

Jerica Wright-Trotter (on Facebook, 3-14-17): "So sad today! My husband and I just received an invitation to the Inauguration. Why it came in the mail almost a month late, we do not know:( We would have been there! Regardless, keep doing what you're doing President Trump. We could not be happier-2 Middle Class Americans!"
My response: "Jerica, you guys should still go! That way, Donald's estimate of how many people attended his inauguration will be slightly closer to accurate. Have a great time, you two!"
My second response: "Oh, and Jerica, you said 'almost a month late.' Do you believe the inauguration occurred in mid-February?

Melissa Diane Leonard (on Facebook, 3-16-17): "Dishonest Dems spreading lies that building was half full last night. No mention of the thousands turned away that waited hours in the cold to get in - they were told building @ capacity. #FAKENEWS #TennesseeLovesPotus"
My response: "People who chant 'USA! USA! USA!' are like dogs that have been trained to bark on command. Bad dog, no health care for you."
Daniel Duarte: "Michael Doherty Showing pride in your country is not a bad thing...sigh..."
My response to Daniel: "Daniel Duarte, it's not about pride, and you should know that. It's about salivating on command, it's about being the willing tools of an insane, narcissistic leader. There is no thought behind those chants."
Daniel Duarte: "Michael Doherty How is he insane? Lowering taxes, improving the economy, securing the border, promoting sovereignty, etc, is not insane. It's not salivating on command, they just want to show their enthusiasm for the country and for Trump, who is a representation of restoring American sovereignty, economic strength and independence, against the crony-corporate/globalist/totalitarian leftist establishment trying to implement a global regime. THEY (the globalist establishment) are what is insane."
My response: "Daniel Duarte, clearly you are a lost cause. Did you ever see any of the Invasion Of The Body Snatchers movies? None of those folks were ever able to regain their senses either. Trump supporters are no longer in control of their minds. Yet they keep typing bullshit on Facebook and Twitter."

Karen K. Dragovich (on Facebook, 3-16-17): "Snowflakes go away...The real people spoke at elections and President Trump is who we choose so get over it...Go away an cry your little eyes out. You democrats states your not hateful but you show hate each and everyday. Grow up! Trump is now our President! Don't like it then move to another ountry if they will have you."
My response: "Karen K Dragovich, please check your medication. You are speaking gibberish again. You're addressing the weather. Remember last spring when you kept talking to rain? Remember what the doctor told you? And you're trying to make distinctions again between real people and imagined people. That's good, except you're getting it all wrong. The voices in your head are not the real people. Karen, please, if you ever want to get better, you're going to have to stay on your medication. And what the hell is an ountry? Also, please learn the difference between 'you're' and 'your,' Karen."

Then I went to Karen's own Facebook page, and saw this post: "Who are you before and after drinking? I invite you to this test. Click here to generate your result now."
My comment: "Karen, remember, the doctor told you that you shouldn't be drinking, not with the medications that you're taking for your delusions." 

I had posted this on Donald Trump's Facebook page on March 16th after he held another rally so he could surround himself with his demented followers: "Who loves Donald more than Donald? No one. No one even comes close to loving Donald as much as Donald does. Donald is Donald's biggest, greatest fan. Donald holds Donald rallies. Donald answers questions about a variety of topics, but the answers are always about Donald, not about the subject asked. Because, really, what subject holds as much fascination for Donald as Donald? The Donald movement continues, brought to us all by Donald."
The message was to Donald, but one of his pet lunatics responded. 
JeanAnn Perry: "And you're jealous Do Do bird. What are to leave our country and go over where the muslums are so you can join their cult and blow yourself up"
My response: "Uh-oh, JeanAnn Perry has escaped from her cage again. Someone want to help me get her back in there before she hurts herself?"

Bob Garner (on Facebook, 3-17-17): "More AWESOME news from the President. THANK YOU.........Confidence in the USA went through the roof on election night and has continued to sky rocket since. We have hope again, not DESPAIR which the last 8 LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG years brought us. THANK GOD....."
My response: "Bob, you are so right! And like Donald says, the elderly have already eaten enough. They don't need any more meals. Let's keep winning (except, of course, those elderly folks... and students... and Muslims... and women... and artists... and transgender people)."

Elaine Campbell (on Facebook, 3-17-17): "Disregard the tiny little poor losers, Trump!!! .....their whining is sooooo pathetic!!!! Keep up the good work and continue to keep the promises you made to those who REALLY care about this country and where it is headed!!!"
My response: "I agree, Elaine! Trump should ignore the tiny and the poor. And he should keep all his promises, like showing us his tax returns and not playing golf."

Stephen Weipert (on Facebook, 3-18-17): "Keep going! The snowflakes, most of whom dont work yell, scream and cry. But those of us who work 40+ hours a week, take care of our families are silent but behind you."
My response: "Good for you, Stephen! If you've managed to silently get behind him, you could probably quickly dispatch the bastard and make an escape. Good luck!"

Barry Olken (on Ivanka Trump's Facebook page, 3-17-17): "The reason I personally admire your Dad is because he is making the unpopular choices that are needed to secure my grandchild's future....God Bless you and your family"
My response: "Barry, if your grandchild is a girl, then Donald will probably try to date her at some point, and then her future will certainly be secure."
Al Collier: "Michael Doherty, what low down, uncalled for statement. You should be investigated"
My response to Al: "Al Collier, spoken like a true fascist. Good for you, you little Nazi."

I posted this on Donald Trump's Facebook page, but it is directed at his supporters: "If you support Donald Trump, you are an enemy of democracy. You are an enemy of the environment. You are an enemy of education. You are an enemy of women. You are an enemy of transgender people. You are an enemy of the poor. You are an enemy of the elderly. You are an enemy of public television. You are an enemy of the arts. If you support Donald Trump, you are a racist and a fascist. There is no way around it. So quit your bullshit and own up to the fact that you are all horrible people. Just admit it. Be proud of it, because you are unlikely to change, because you seem immune to facts. You ignore any information that is contrary to your belief in Donald Trump. One more thing.... unless you are a millionaire, Donald Trump will end up screwing you before too long. So you are your own enemy as well."

Victoria Price (on Facebook, 3-20-17): "KY. loves, Donald Trump, you, just keep doing, what you do best, leading the way to make America great again. Please, remember, we like you, the way you are. I didn't vote for a politician in a suit, that says what you want to hear, and does nothing after they are voted in. Donald Trump, you are the kind of man, that says what he means, and does what he says, that is why, I voted for you."
My response: "Victoria, you are out of your mind. You like him the way he is? You like being grabbed by the pussy, do you, Victoria? You like being lied to? You like having your health care taken away? You like your environment being ruined? Victoria, you probably should look inward a bit, take some time, discover where you went wrong. It's not too late, Victoria. You can still turn things around."
My second response: "Victoria, most Trump fans love exclamation points. You stick out because you love commas. Look at them all, so many unnecessary commas."

Cyndi Goodrich (on Facebook, 3-20-17): "You were born for such a time as this. GOD has anointed you and appointed you. Stay humble before HIM and there's not a devil in Hell big enough to stop you from fulfilling what HE'S ordained you to do!"
(As you might guess, a lot of people responded to this lunacy from Cyndi.) 
My response: "Friends, stop teasing Cyndi. She's having a tough time fighting her way through some serious illusions. And her medication is having adverse effects on her appearance as well. Also, she just learned from her doctor that the cloud formations above her shack have not been sending her the correct lottery numbers, and she thinks her favorite television characters are angry with her. So these nutty outbursts are kind of understandable." 
Then I went to Cyndi's Facebook page and posted this: "Cyndi, God told me to contact you. He wants you to stop supporting Donald Trump. God told me that Donald Trump is actually a tool of the devil, and all of his supporters have an eternity of damnation to look forward to. Repent, Cyndi! Repent now!"
I think there is a good chance she'll believe me.

Judy Carolyn Adams (on Facebook, 3-20-17): "Haters will hate.. I am 100% Trump fan. He is MY president and will till the end of his time.... Not everything can be controlled but so far he is doing a great job...."
My response: "Judy, what is it you love about him? His respect for women? His love for the environment? His understanding of government? His smooth diplomatic skills? His impeccable spelling? His honesty? His care toward education?"  
Miranda Mitchell (on Facebook, 3-20-17): "We love you Donald Trump. Hold your head high. Do not let the racists bother you. I just seen something that made me very sad on here. Thank you for saving this country from Radical Islam. You know if anymore come on this soil there will be a war. The little man will fight. We see Europe."
My response: "Miranda, the racists don't bother Donald. They voted for him. They're the ones supporting him. So you have nothing to worry about, Miranda. And I hope you're right about the midgets fighting. I think that will entertain a lot of people and lift our spirits." 

Farruh Standridge (on Facebook, 3-20-17): "I wake up everyday knowing Hillary lost and lost badly, and that my friend brings a smile to my face! Happy Monday Mr President. Are we done deporting these illegals outta here yet? If not, keep deporting them!"
My response: "Farruh, every day your friend delivers a smile to your face? Is the delivery the same time each day, or does your friend try to surprise you? Does your friend deliver smiles to others too? There are a lot of people who could use a smile. For example, those who will lose their health care. Also, women. Also, transgender folks. Also, the elderly. I think it's wonderful that your friend brings a smile to your face, and I hope he or she expands that service." 

Wannetta Collins (on Facebook, 3-24-17): "Look at all the communist trolls on here WE THE PEOPLE support Trump the Marxist democrats hate America they can"t even support our Troops"
My response: "Wannetta, without proper punctuation, your comment could mean a lot of things. For example, are you saying Trump is a Marxist? It sounds like it. You should probably take some kind of English class." 

Diane Johnson (on Facebook, 3-24-17): "Donald Trump is truly the people's president. Instead of hosting entertainers and sports figures as was done by the previous.... President Trump hosts real Americans. Today was no exception as he honored these wonderful, courageous hero's."
My response: "Diane Johnson, Donald Trump desperately wants to host famous entertainers. But those folks want absolutely nothing to do with this asshole. Also, why did you put an apostrophe in 'heroes'?" 

On March 29th, I posted my daily alternative fact on Melania Trump's Facebook page: "Today's alternative fact (to help you get through the day): Melania Trump is in love with Donald and swears she misses him every moment they are apart. Furthermore, she denies accusations that she is still a prostitute and that Donald is simply her biggest client. 'That's absurd,' she says. 'At this point, he wouldn't be able to afford me anyway.'"
I wasn't trying to engage anyone, but some people responded anyway.
Catherine Carrasco: "Trashy people talk trash."
(Interestingly, she also liked my comment.)
My response: "Catherine Carrasco, do funny people talk fun? Do silly people talk sill? Do skinny people talk skin?"
Catherine Carrasco: "Michael Where not Elementary"
My response: "Catherine Carrasco, 'Where not Elementary'? What does that mean?"
Catherine Carrasco: "if you have any sense of class about you you will not talk about other people like that that's God's job to condemn not yours"  
Kathy Columbo: "Freedom of speech used to defame a person's character, is not freedom. Instead, it is taking one's liberties and abusing them."   
My response: "Kathy Colombo, I like to abuse my liberties at least a few times a week. You know, whenever I'm lonely."
Sandy Bratcher Osborne: "You will always be lonely because you have a ugly ugly heart and aren't very bright. Also your rude sarcasm isn't very good.
My response: "Sandy Bratcher Osborne, I love that you included a grammatical error in the sentence where you accused someone else of not being bright. You're funny, Sandy." 
Kathy Columbo: "Michael Doherty Good for you. Looks like your trolling got you the attention you sought." 
My response: "Kathy Colombo, I call an end to the use of the word 'troll' online, unless, of course, you're talking about Dungeons & Dragons or Lord Of The Rings." 
Kathy Columbo: " Michael Doherty Well, I guess you can't control the narrative because you are what you are - Sorry, trolls are not just for D&D, LOTR, Harry Potter, or children's fairy tales - you are now one too. 'One who purposely and deliberately (that purpose usually being self-amusement) starts an argument in a manner which attacks others on a forum without in any way listening to the arguments proposed by his or her peers.' There are other less socially appropriate words that could be used for someone who is just being purposefully snarky and sarcastically problematic, but I think troll works just fine." 
My response: "Kathy, wrong. People use 'troll' for anyone who has an opinion that's different from their own. And it seems to be only folks on the right who use it. The same people who use non-words like 'libtard.' Also, I wasn't trying to start an argument. I was just offering a bit of humor while making a point. Those who argue with it are those who don't take it in the spirit it's offered, and only then has an argument started." 
Anita Bruce: "Nothing like a common classless thug like Michael Doherty to pass judgement on a lady who has never done him harm. What a puking bully you are. I hope all the hate you spew comes right back to you. Remember your own words when karma comes to school you, filthy troll." 
My response: "Anita Bruce, you spelled 'judgment' wrong. And also apparently you neglected to read the bit about 'troll,' you humorless hag." 
Emily Taylor: "Michael Doherty = MORON." 
My response: "Emily Taylor, wrong. But thanks for playing. Also, don't use all capital letters. It makes you seem desperate and insecure." 
My final response to these people, but specifically to Anita Bruce: "One last thing: I find it amusing how easily you folks get upset. And how quick you are to jump to conclusions. After all, for example, Anita, you have no idea if Melania Trump has done me harm. Perhaps she and I met once and she overcharged me."

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