Friday, April 11, 2014

Lettuce Has Become Unreliable

Lettuce has become unreliable. This seems a recent development, but perhaps my memory is simply unclear on the subject, and all along lettuce has been trouble. But these days, for sure, lettuce is turning brown so quickly. Two days. I just checked the receipt, which is still on the counter. I bought the lettuce on the eighth, in the afternoon. And on the tenth, it had gone bad. Or at least it had gone brown. What is the cause? Lettuce was more reliable than this, wasn't it? Has it come under the influence of bananas lately? Or is something wrong with my refrigerator? The water seems the right temperature, so...

In a marginally related topic, when I was a child and forced to go to a church, every time the priest said, "Let us pray," I imagined the church full of heads of lettuce bowing and mumbling in prayer. This went on for years, and I was never able to shake the image. Finally I just had to leave Catholicism altogether. Things are fine now.

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