Tips To Keep You From Sounding Stupid

Here is today's tip to keep you from sounding like a moron: The word "ultimate" means "the final, the last." It does not mean "the best." Otherwise, what would "penultimate" mean? The second best? A silver medal winner received the penultimate award? Ridiculous. Years ago, a television program was advertised as "the ultimate reality show." I was thrilled with that news, as so-called reality shows had been on for far too long already and every one of them was terrible. But it turned out that advertisement was a fucking lie.

Tips To Keep You From Sounding Stupid

Today's tip to keep you from sounding like a moron: "Retro" is not a word. It is a prefix, as in "retrograde," "retroactive," "retrocedent" and "retrospect." Using "retro" as a word will certainly alert those around you that you didn't pay attention in school.

Tips To Keep You From Sounding Stupid

Today's tip to keep you from sounding like a moron: Do not use the word "ambivalent" when you mean "indifferent." The two words have quite different definitions, with "ambivalent" meaning feeling very strongly but in two opposing ways. It's easy to understand the word if you understand the prefix "ambi," which means both. As in "ambidextrous," which means being able to use both hands equally (as opposed to meaning "hands aren't important" or something foolish like that).

Tips To Keep You From Sounding Stupid

Today's tip to keep you from sounding like like a moron: Never say you'll meet someone at 12 p.m., for 12 p.m. doesn't exist. "PM" stands for "post meridiem," and 12 is the meridiem. Something can't be the meridiem and also be after the meridiem. Instead, say you'll meet him at noon (because "12 m" sounds odd). Or make your plans for 12:01 p.m. 

Tips To Keep You From Sounding Stupid

Today's tip to keep you from sounding like a moron: Never claim you're giving one hundred ten percent or that you agree with someone one thousand percent.

Tips To Keep You From Sounding Stupid

Today's tip to keep you from sounding like a moron: Commit to a word, rather than giving up on it halfway through, like those idiots who say "celeb" and "phenom."

Tips To Keep You From Sounding Stupid

Today's tip to keep you from sounding like a moron: "cringe" is a verb. Do not use it as an adjective. When you do, intelligent people cringe.